TASK 1 ( IELTS ACADEMIC ) Outokumpu companies share price - LINE GRAPH

the change of share-priced of outokumpu companies

The line graph demonstrates the change of share-priced of outokumpu companies in a five-year period from january 2006 throught december 2010.
As can be seen from the graph, it is clearly evident that the pattern of share price greatly differed over the time frame.
At the beginning of the course, the share price stood at about 12.5 EUR .This figure then had some fluctuations around 17 to 20 EUR in 2006.
The year 2007 experienced a rapid climb in the share price which reached a peak of more than 30 EUR.The share price then dove dramatically by 10 EUR from 30 to 20 EUR in between 2007 and mid 2008.

In 2018 , The share price underwented a fast upward trend (around 30 EURO) .However this did not last long, the share price came down steeply to approximately 7 EUR in the beginning of 2009.During the period of 2009 and 2010,there was a violent fluctuation in the amount of price share .And finally , at the end of the period ,the price share was ,around 10 EUR.

The line graph below shows the changes in the share price of Outokumpu companies in euros between January 2006 and December 2010.

Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below.

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  The line graph below shows the changes in the share price of Outokumpu companies in euros between Ja
  

The share price then dove dramatically by 10 EUR from 30 to 20 EUR in between 2007 and mid 2008.=> at the end of 2007 ( maybe it will be more accurate)

And in the first sentence of the last paragraph, it must be "in 2008", be careful

Hope that you will pay more attention next time.

@MiAnnn
Hi there!

Welcome to the forum. I'll try to provide you with feedback on your essay.

Omit the usage of filler words that do not substantially add depth to your essay. Since you're working with word counts, it would be beneficial if you can stick with using terms that are beneficial for you. If you can accomplish this, you'll optimize the space you have in your essay more, creating more of a formal structure to work with. This can also result to a more appropriate academic tone.

For instance, observe these revisions:

... of share-priced of ... from january January 2006 throught until december December 2010.
As can be ..., it It is clearly evident that the pattern of share price greatly differed over the time frame period.

At In the beginning of the course, the share price it stood at about 12.5 EUR .This ... fluctuations There were fluctuations at around 17 ...

The year 2007 experienced a rapid climb increase in the share price which reached , reaching a peak of ... The share price then It dove dramatically by 10 EUR from 30 to 20 ... and mid 2008.

Always optimize the space you have in your essay. Best of luck as always!