IELTS - aids by developed countries to third-word countries

not only financial help to poorer countries

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many undeveloped countries receive aids from the develop countries in forum of money for decades, however it sometimes cannot be the best solution to tackle the poverty problem. Therefore, I completely agree that the developed countries should help these poor countries in other methods than the financial aids and I will discuss the reasons in the paragraphs below.

Most of the financial aids which is presented to the developed countries are not used to develop the country itself, this is because the high level of corruption. Many leaders of these poor countries are not democratically elected and have a strong grip of power over their people. Hence, the funds can be easily stolen or sometimes can be directed to another purposes that it should be. As a result, these countries keep to be in poverty and cannot witness any growth or potential using these financial aids.

Another point is that these countries who receive the financial aids may not have a strong economic policies or highly professional expertise who can use these funds to develop the country's economy reaching high growth ratios. But, these aids can deteriorate the current situation and increase the levels of debt and sometimes the countries find themselves about to bankrupt. That is why, If the developed countries presented its aids in forum of investments or free equipment for instance, it will be highly effective to encourage many industries and decrease the unemployment ratios leading to tackling the poverty problems.

In conclusion, it is important for developing countries to help the third world countries to reform, but I completely agree that these aids should be in other forums than money and these developed countries should monitor the direction of these aids.

please help me to know which band it deserve

Some typo observed, please double check =]

...however it sometimes cannot be...

I think the position is very clear, thereby you can remove "sometime" in the 1st sentence.

Also I recommend you to categorize your argument point into 1. improper usage in financial aid and 2. lack of knowledge for country development. It will make your structure and article clearer.

You may consider to slightly add your recommendation in which form of aids to be provided, i.e. knowledge of investment and farming.

Cheers/

thanks a lot