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IELTS--Air travel only brings advantages to the rich people?

ekekek 25 / 51  
Aug 2, 2011   #1
Air travel only brings advantages to the rich people. But the majority of people do not benefit from it. To what extent do you agree?

Currently, people have more disposable income to spend on travel. As one of favorable travelling transportations, planes play an irreplaceable role as it provides people convenience. Under this situation, some people are worried that air travel will become a priority to the wealthy lie in the sky-high price. From my perspective, a great member of average people could still get benefits.

Admittedly, the rich people can select the first-class in the plane. It is commonplace that a plane is divided in three different parts according to different equipments and services. The wealthy people have more options to determine their journey in comparison to the poor who have limited money to take the economy-class.

However, it takes equal time for all the people in different classes to travel by air. Even though less comfortable can be felt, a large amount of average citizens could enjoy the time-saving and efficient travel by plane. Therefore, the arrangement of a plane appeals to various people from different works of lives instead of restricting in a few rich people.

On the social scale, the boom of air travel will provide more job vacancies to youngsters. Every year, there are numerous graduates struggling in looking for jobs under stiff competitions. With the prosperity of traveling, individuals tend to find jobs easily and gain the ability of supporting themselves.

To conclude, the advantages of air travel belongs to all the people, regardless of the fortune. Apparently, more people will be attracted by plane if the price will be lower.

ajit88rai 22 / 188 3  
Aug 3, 2011   #2
Hi Katie,
Work on your grammar part,and also the spellings too. The arguments as I personally feel aren't very strong. Plus you need to work on the conclusion part for sure. Its too short and pretty normal. Try to be a little different and think before you write. I have read your earlier essays and I feel that this one isn't as good as those. So try to think of good lines and good arguments. When you read the topic, take 5-10 mins to think about it and then write it.

Good luck and cheers

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