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IELTS - Writing task 2 - Allow children to make their own choices will turn them into selfish person



Dolia 1 / -  
Aug 27, 2022   #1
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.



Parenting has long been a major topic regarding both scholarly research and daily discussion for decades. Despite the fact that there is an increasingly popular opinion claiming that letting children have a complete decision on daily routines such as meal, styling, and amusement will eventually trigger negative individualism, other people are prone to believe that independent decision making is crucial for nurturing children more comprehensively.

As a matter of fact, decision making is largely considered a compulsory skill regardless of various personality tendencies and thinking patterns. And not to mention that decision making is still a difficult task for grown-up individuals, it is becoming more and more significant to teach children how to make decisions on their own for the ultimate purpose of achieving self-sufficient and self-dependent at later ages. Indeed, the most optimal approach to illustrate to children the nature of decision making is to initially imply it in their simple daily routines. In other words, the exposure of children toward the choices of what to eat, what to wear, and what to play will concretely form a solid foundation for them to retain consistency in further life-long issues which requisite decisive characteristics.

On top of that, individuals who constantly put themselves first and only care about themselves while ignoring the well-being of others are more likely a result of failure in parenting regarding numerous aspects from an early age, rather than being affected by the opportunities to conduct choices that are passed on by their parents. Common belief indicates that children are a real reflection of their parents and the environment in which they grew up in. For instance, if a mother or father has a frequent tendency in behaving selfishly toward the surrounding people, there would be a significant likelihood that a child will grow up being selfish and lack sympathy as well as possess a low level of emotional intelligence. Nurturing patterns and influences from parents' behaviors are the key drivers that contribute greatly to a children's personality and attitude toward the surrounding environment in the future, rather than the early decision-making opportunities that are held accountable for the mentioned controversy.

According to the above analysis, I incline to believe it should not be certain that children's decision making on simple routines will bring along negative individualism in the upcoming ages. Alternatively, encouraging independent decision making will surprisingly cater for a more comprehensive outcome regarding self-sufficient and self-dependent.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15344  
Aug 28, 2022   #2
The first error that must be addressed in this essay is the over-writing. 402 words is 102 words over the suggested 300 word count. This is indicative of a practice test that was completed without the benefit of using a40 minute timer. If a timer had been used, then the writer would know his actual mitten word count limitation.

There are inaccuracies to be found in this essay as well. The irrelevant first sentence deals with information that is not shared by the original. This is going to be considered a score deductible topic deviation. While the proceeding sentence properly represents the given discussion points, the missing (required) writer's opinion will be another negative score for the paragraph.

It should be obvious by now that an over-written essay that does not meet the writing requirements will not get a passing score. Response format correctness is a major scoring consideration Do that improperly and a failing score will be the end result. Scores are based on writing compliance, not the word count.

Opinions presented are also not correctly discussed. There is only a singular point of view present were comparative viewpoints are needed. Wherever

Some people

and

Other people

keywords are used in a presentation, the public V. personal analysis must be used for each prompt stated opinion.

By providing a clear personal opencon in the conclusion, The writer mistakenly created an open-ended essay. The lack of a concluding summary will result in an overall failing score due to task writing inaccuracies.


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