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The annual expenditures for five purposes in a British school in three different years

yichiehli 1 / -  
May 16, 2016   #1
The charts compare percentage of yearly expenditure for five purposes in a British school in three different years over a 20 years period.
Overall, teacher's salary accounts for the majority of yearly expenditure throughout the period. By contrast, while insurance showed an increasing change, it still had the least percentage of annual spending over 20 years.

In 1981, 40 per cent of the annual spending served as teacher's salary, compared to 28 per cent for other workers. The yearly expenditure for teacher's salary increased by 10% in 1991 but decreased to 45% in 2001. The figure for other worker's salary fell to 22% in 1991 and to 15% in 2001.

On the other hand, only 2 per cent of yearly expenditure spent on insurance in 1981, and the figure increased to 3% in 1991 and 8% in 2001. Besides, the budget for resource and furniture/equipment was the same in 1981, 15% of the annual spending. However, the number for resource was four times as much as furniture and equipment in 1991, 20% and 5% respectively. In 2001, the school increased the percentage of yearly expenditure for furniture and equipment to 23 % and decreased the figure for resource to only 8%.

zohaib 2 / 4  
May 17, 2016   #2
What is your required Bands and when youa re going to take IELTS?
ichanpants89 [Contributor] 16 / 777 309  
May 17, 2016   #3
Yichieh, welcome to EssayForum :) This is a remarkable place to practice your writing skills, especially in relation to IELTS and other types of essays. Moreover, I encourage you to actively participate in this forum by conveying meaningful feedback towards other members' essays. However, some feedback are considered unacceptable by this forum moderator if you are only write 1 or 2 sentences. Therefore, you need to do your best in delivering meaningful feedback by writing for at least a paragraph or more.

With regards to your essay, I think that this essay has already well-written. The flow of ideas were well-developed. Minor grammatical errors regarding to preposition were not interfered the whole process. The report summary was very clear and understandable. My suggestion for you is that, you only need to reduce your repetitive words by using some synonyms, and therefore you will be able to pass the exam with flying colors :)
Ilmi_03 47 / 69 11  
May 21, 2016   #4
Greetings, Yichieh Lee.
Overall, I can follow the descriptions since you have written. However, there are some slightly correction for you.

- The pie charts compare percentage -- it will be better if you mention the type of graph shown
- over a 20- years period
- Overall, teacher's salary accounts was the greatestfor the majority

I would like to suggest you to avoid making repetition.

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