Better gain a tertiary education or equip with soft skills to achieve great success in working?

University qualifications

Some people think that university qualifications will lead to a secure future while others believe that soft skills will lead to success at work.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Heading to the future, the young people always comes into consideration of whether they should gain a tertiary education or equip themselves with soft skills to achieve great success in working. These both sides have been a controversial issue that I would analyze in my essay.

It is commonly thought that university graduates were educated with the professional field in a certain industry, hence, they can work to some extent even they have a little of working experience. It is undeniable that post - graduated students with a strong degree of which is included the professional and in-depth knowledge will have many opportunities to be recruited with well-paying jobs. For instance, some global entrepreneurs require university qualifications acting as the prerequisites for the job recruitment.

However, it is also thought that soft skills such as time management, conflict solvability, relationship ... play a crucial role leading to success in the field of working. The fact proves that in working environment, many qualifications are in need of being tackled with soft skills owing to issues of interpersonal relationship. To exemplify, when you are in charge of one task in new teamwork in which you have not been acquainted with the others before, your adaptability skill is essential to get on well with every members in the group to reach the utmost target.

Along with the variety of reasons above, university graduate is essential for academic jobs while soft skills and experience are more useful in vocation and business. In my point of view, basically, the university qualifications are of importance, however I always aware of enhancing my soft skills to get better on job.

@tranglv80
Seeing as you're new here, welcome. I'm here to give you feedback on this essay.

Firstly, the intention behind the first paragraph was quite good. The execution, however, can still be improved. Consider shortening your lines to create more structure. This will also improve the readability of your text - something that is often missed out by people when they write.

Furthermore, the transition between your paragraphs alongside the general flow of the essay is quite messy. I would heavily recommend that you summarize how the flow is going to be in the first paragraph. This will help readers understand the formatting and structure a little bit better.

Try to also ensure that your text is purely academic. Evade adding (for instance, the ellipsis) unnecessary details that do not really contribute to the text itself and the substance. Doing this can help you strengthen your writing to the core.