Unanswered [1]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


Child care from centers or blood relatives



meomeomeodhsa 1 / -  
Mar 13, 2021   #1
Topic:
Nowadays, many families have both parents working. Some working parents believe other family members like grandparents can take care of their children, while others think childcare centres provide the best care.


Discuss both views and give your own opinion.



In modern society, due to the desire to supplement family's current financial base, working-parents family are now becoming predominant. The prevalence of this family configuration leads to the increasing demand for child care. Opinions are divided into whether daycare centers or blood relatives such as elder adults provide better nurturing for children, but it is my firm conviction that the latter's upbringing is the best.

On the one hand, childcare centers such as preschools or kindergartens seem appealing to couples who are inundated with dual working due to several reasons. Firstly, thanks to the convenience of these services, working parents save a lot of time; to be more specific, parents no longer need to juggle child care and career; thereby properly concentrating on their paid work. Secondly, daycare centers offer various extracurricular activities such as singing contests, storytelling competitions or weekly picnics, which are ideal opportunities for children to socially interact with people of different ages and genders. These merits contribute greatly to children's soft skills later in their life.

on the other hand, I take the view that support from a relative by consanguinity is of tremendous value to the whole family. First, the grandparents' child care is such a balm to financially disadvantaged parents especially those who struggle to accommodate basic needs, not to mention afford their offspring costly care offered by daycare centers. secondly, routes of connecting between the elderly and their descendants, which tends to be rarely seen in modern society, can be easily created. By constantly giving their grandchildren both physical and mental care, the older adults simultaneously befriend and bond with them. This kinship relationship obviously does not exist if the children are care in the center.

In conclusion, although it is undeniable that both parents and children benefits a lot from daycare centers, these services do not suit some families with poor socio-economic background and also sometimes minimize the chances to heal the distance between the elderly and the youth.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15467  
Mar 14, 2021   #2
You have presented an opinion in the first sentence that is not part of the original prompt presentation. You are not required to give a reason in the restatement. Just repeat the facts as indicated. Do not alter the prompt requirement as that is a prompt deviation that will limit your TA score.

This is a 3 reasoning paragraph presentation that focuses on the explanation of the public opinions in separate paragraphs:
- Some working parents believe other family members like grandparents can take care of their children
- others think childcare centres provide the best care.
- the latter's upbringing is the best.

Focus on the explanation of the 2 public opinions using 3rd person pronouns. Why should you do that? Well, that will help you clearly indicated whose opinion is being explained and what it is based on. The reason for that? The prompt uses the words "Some working parents" and "other thing", indicating a difference in public opinion presentation. Once you explain why the public might believe those individual reasons, you can present your own opinion in the 3rd reasoning paragraph using the first person point of view.


Home / Writing Feedback / Child care from centers or blood relatives
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳