Toefl essay For children it is better to grow at the country side or in th city

Hi,
I am preparing for the toefl ibt please help me with the writing section.
Thanks.

For children it is better to grow at the country side or in the city. Agree or disagree?

There is no doubt that selecting a proper place for growing up the children seems to be an important decision for the parents. Every parent wants their children to be successful in their life, and for this, they give their best effort to grow them up. Many parents argue that growing children at the country side is more beneficial because cities are polluted which results in bad health of the child. However in my opinion, city would be the best place for the growth of a child. Cities provide better education, better development and better facilities for the growth of a child.

Cities provide better education facilities to the children. There are varieties of school such as government schools, private schools, Montessori schools and so on. Therefore there would be various options for the parents to select the best school of their choice for their children. Moreover, transportation services are more proper in the city areas, so reaching towards particular place becomes easy. But as compared to this, countryside places give the only option of the school that too may be not located at the nearer distance. Hence many of the children have to face problems while studies.

Big cities do provide extra curricular activities to the children which would be helpful in the development of child. For instances, sports, art and other activities which give the opportunity to develop their hidden art along with the studies. In addition to this, there would be various competition for the exams and activities which make the child to utilize his/her art in a better way and to prove himself in the society.

Also, big cities has various facilities to make human life comfortable such as hospitals. If the child get sick then proper treatment at the proper time. Along with this various technologies, market places, were there and, this things would be helpful for the children to understand today's world. Anyhow a child has to grow up by gaining the knowledge from the surrounding and has to compete in the world to prove himself.

In conclusion, I must say that the children can be better grown up in the cities because of the facilities available for education, other creative activities and to get the knowledge about the various technologies development.

I like your essay, you give good examples to support your idea.

which make the child to utilize his/her art in a better way and to prove himself in the society.

pronoun antecedent agreement:
I think it would be better if you do it this way: children----------their----------them-self.

pronoun antecedent agreement:
A pronoun (he,she,it) is substitute for a noun. it must agree in number and gender (male,female) with its antecedent(the word it replaces).

to avoid getting confused, just try to write in plural.

for example:
The apples fell from ([its,their) tree.

somebody dropped (their, his or her)ring down the drain.

However in my opinion, a city would be the best place for the growth of a child.

Your English is almost perfect! What are you worried about? You will do well.

I still see a few little mistakes, like this:
Also, big cities have various facilities to make...
or you can write:
Also, a big city has various facilities to make

This is an interesting argument! I think most people would say the country is better. I want to tell you that "growing up" is what the kids do, but "raising children" is what parents do, so:

In conclusion, I must say that the children can be raised better in the cities because