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Children should always follow their parents' advice.

anhgiang 1 / 1  
May 23, 2017   #1

Kids should demonstrate their honour and obedience toward parents

In a common family, children's obedience to their parents' advice is very ordinary. Some say that off-springs should always follow their parents' commandment. Personally, I find this statement is just appropriate in some situation.

To begin with, there are some outstanding reasons that children should obey their parent's counsel. First of all, parents are more mature than children, because they are older, they have more experience in life. That is the reason why children sometimes do not know what is the right and wrong or what is better for them while the older generations are better at this. A quintessential example is that a child has a number of new friends, he does not understand much about them, but his parents might know them well and tell him whom he should make friends with. Then, he had better follow this advice. In addition, obeying parents does not only mean doing what they tell, it is also honouring older generations as well. They are people who gave birth and brought children up little by little, they are the most people understanding their children. Consequently, taking parents' advice is one way to show their respect and their love. For instance, a boy wants to go out with his friends, he has his father's permission, whereas his mother forbids him, even thought there is nothing to do at home. He can go but he still stay at home just because he respects his parents.

In contrast, there are some reasons that children need not always listen to their parents' commandment. The most noticeable reason is that parents' advice is not always proper. Despite their maturity, sometimes they might not update current tendency, therefore, they have some wrong opinions about their children's demands. To illustrate, my uncle bans his daughter from making friends with any males. He just wants her to go to school and stay at home studying. He thinks it is the best thing for her but it makes her bored and under great pressure. The last opinion should be mentioned is off-springs' independence which means that they can do anything they want as long as it is legal. When a child can take up a hobby, a university or a job by himself, this means that he is more mature, and he has responsibility for his whole life. My cousin tended to become a singer while his parents want him to be a doctor. The did many ways to convince him giving up his dream but he tried his best to carry out his dream, as a result, he is now a famous singer. Hence, when their children have their own decision, it illustrates that they are more mature and thoughtful.

In conclusion, children should take their parents' counsel so as to demonstrate their honour and obedience, but when their advice is not reasonable, they can explain to their parents so that they will be understanding and sensible with their aim.
TJLuschen - / 241 203  
May 24, 2017   #2
I think you have done a pretty good job in addressing the prompt, but honoring your parents involves more than following their advice and their rules. I guess I am not sure exactly what the prompt was, since the title of the essay and the title of the post don't match. Anyway, you have given a lot of relevant examples and your writing is clear, but I do have some specific suggestions below. By the way, you do have a lot of "comma splice" run-on sentences. You are not allowed to connect two complete sentences with a comma. You need to use a period or semicolon.

In a common {"typical" seems better here} family,

advice is very ordinary. {"commonplace" might be better than ordinary}
that [offspring] should always {but "offspring" sounds a bit odd for people I think}

this statement is [only] appropriate in some [situations].
reasons [why] children should obey
children[. B]ecause they
of new friends[. H]e does not

what they [say], it is also

little by little[; t]hey are the most people [who understand] their children [best].
his friends[. H]e has his father's

mother forbids him, even [though]

He can go but he still[ stays] at home
their parents' commandment. {"commandment" sounds a bit odd in this context}

they might not update current tendency, {this phrase is incorrect}

The last opinion [that] should be mentioned

My cousin [intended] to become ... parents [wanted] him to be a doctor. The [tried] many ways to convince him [to give] up his dream

carry out his dream[. A]s a result,

but when their [parents'] advice is not reasonable
OP anhgiang 1 / 1  
May 24, 2017   #3
@TJLuschen thank you for your comments. Here is a topic of writing in IELTS book that i'm studying. My teacher didn't indicate my mistakes. So once more time, Thanks a lot.

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