Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
People have different views about whether they should try to compete against others to ensure victory for themselves exclusively or learn to collaborate with each other effectively to achieve a common goal. While competitiveness is undeniably an essential life skill in today's world that can inspire people to push their boundaries, I would argue that being able to cooperate is far more useful for everyone to become successful - whether at work, at school or in daily life.
On the one hand, competition can be a great source of motivation for people to work harder and smarter to succeed. Since aiming for the best is part of human nature, a certain amount of healthy rivalry will encourage them to try their best and think out of the box to outdo others. This will in turn foster innovations which make our life much easier and more comfortable. For example, constant competition between Samsung and Apple in the global smartphone market forced these two technology giants to upgrade and add new AI-powered features such as translation without Internet connection in order to meet consumer's evolving demands. If there had not been for the competition between companies like this, we would be less likely to use such state-of-the-art devices.
On the other hand, I believe that cooperation is a more important life skill that everyone should have. Firstly, collaborating allows people, companies, and even countries to solve problems more quickly and easily without having to waste time on the process of trial and error as they can point out each other's weaknesses and share experience. For instance, after China and the US agreed to join hands to tackle environmental issues, CO2 emissions in these two countries have been reported to reduce significantly in recent years. Secondly, unlike people who tend to suffer from stress and insecurity caused by competition, those who are in cooperative situations are more likely to enjoy an atmosphere of relaxation and safety because they can receive unconditional support and encouragement from their teammates. This can have a positive impact on people's mental health in the long term.
In conclusion, while competition can sometimes be useful as a motivation for people to excel themselves, I still believe that people need to try to collaborate more because it not only helps find effective solutions much more easily but also plays an important role in improving our mental well-being.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 15168 others
The word "each" indicates one, singular. So the term "others" should be in singular form as well (other) using the -S format.
Use the correct comparative discussion format next time. Always present an explanation for the public point of view and then give your opinion regarding it. If you do not support it, then explain why. If you support it, then add to the supporting reasons. Explain each side within 5 paragraphs. In the current format, you are providing only your personal opinion throughout the explanation paragraphs. That will create a problem for you during the actual test because you presented an under developed explanation. A thorough development of both the public and personal explanations should be presented in each of the 2 reasoning paragraphs.
Avoid a run on sentence presentation in the conclusion. Use 2 sentences at the least, to reverse paraphrase the previous discussion points. The standard for the concluding summary is at least 2 properly developed idea sentences.
