Is Death Penalty needed for our lives to be more secured and have less crimes?

orkhan 12 / 19

Mar 4, 2013 #1

Without capital punishment (the death penalty) our lives are less secure and crimes of
violence increase. Capital punishment in essential to control violence in society.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? IELTS TASK

Throughout history the death penalty has been the most severe punishment that can be applied by states.Historically,the execution of law offenders and political opposites has been used to suppress political conflicts and punish crimes nearly by all communities.The essence of capital punishment in controlling violence in society is controversial issue.From this point of view,there are conflicting opinions in society.

There are 2 opposite sides have been formed on this issue such as Supporters and Opponents.The supporters argue that death penalty deters criminals from doing nasty things again and they deserve it in some circumstances.On the contrary, the opponents including me claim that it is the violation of right to life as proclaimed in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.Moreover,it is premeditated and cold -blooded killing of a human being by the state.Besides,it does not deter offenders from commiting crime again.For instance; There is higher rate of crime in USA which supports capital punishment compared with Europe which opposite to this penalty.Lately,minutes before executions due to the emergence of new evidence that some people forgiven,acquitted or allowed to open a new case.The other negative side of death sentence is that it prevents offenders to find right way and being a part of community again.Additionally,to know that someone somewhere was executed can be a bad conscience for the community and brutally executed methods can be wound psychology of people.In my opinion,the capital punishment must be changed with the life imprisonment which the most of democratic countries apply.To my mind it is more civilized way of solution.

In conclusion,I'd like to emphasize that the capital punishment is not the way out and it will not decrease the rate of crimes but only increase the level of psychological violence amid community.Therefore,all governments must search for new alternative methods and try to bring offenders back to the community as a part of society.

Pahan 1 / 1824

Mar 4, 2013 #2

There are 2 opposite sides have been formed on this issue such as Supporters and Opponents.

Well, every argument have supporters and opposers. Therefore this sentence sounds a little mild.

On the contrary, the opponents including me claim that it is the violation of right to life as proclaimed in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.

On the other hand, opposers, like me, claim that it is a violation of human rights as proclaimed in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.

The other negative side of death sentence is that it prevents offenders to find right way and being a part of community again.

This is a good point. Everybody deserve's a second chance sort of thing.

Additionally,to know that someone somewhere was executed can be a bad conscience for the community and brutally executed methods can be wound psychology of people.In my opinion,the capital punishment must be changed with the life imprisonment which the most of democratic countries apply.

This sentence is way too long. Pls rephrase it.

I like your essay even though I'm not on your side. You have understood the essay and written it to support what you believe in. I hope my small suggestions helped. :)

dumi 1 / 6795

Mar 13, 2013 #3

There are 2 opposite sides have been formed on this issue such as Supporters and Opponents.

Avoid having numbers in this type of essays. Write them in words.

You write well. But it's better if you express what stand you would take on this argument in your introduction. That helps your examiner to follow you in that specific direction; Have less work for your examiner and you'd earn more marks :D

You need to have at least two body paras if you are preparing for TOEFL or IELTS. The essay structure for them is ; Introduction + 2 Body paras + Conclusion.

If you have enough time, you can have more number of body paras :)