Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


IELTS task 2: Many developing countries are currently expanding their tourism industries.


Hagnhang 1 / -  
Oct 26, 2021   #1
Many developing countries are currently expanding their tourism industries.

Why is this case? Is it a positive development?



Nowadays, investment in tourism industries plays as a vital role in some developing countries. Although it has own reasons, I think that there are many effects both positive and negative.

It is considered to have following causes of pouring money to tourism general. First, local potentials are exploited therefore people have their job opportunities and the unemployment rate would decrease. Moreover, native residents could also communicate, get together with foreigners without oversea. By the way, it broaden knowledge people do not have conditions to go abroad. Second, this investment is a primary intention of government. They want to open and enhance international relations by tourism, which could show their cultures, valuable resources in order to get attention on other countries investors. These strategies lead to the developing countries' economic grow advance by co-operation.

However, if government overexpand their tourism industries, local nature and resources might be drained. Due to many tourists' unawareness of protect environment, it may result in the bad pollution in developing countries. For instance, in Viet Nam, many beautiful beaches are vulnerable by tourists. Furthermore, this investment is also harmful to local resources, which are overexploitation in order to build entertainment centers, resorts. As long as these man-made constructions increases, the beauty of nature would disappear. Equally issues, developing countries' economic depends on tourism so some other industries could do not improve enough. Overall, in my opinion, there are many drawbacks of pouring money to this business, besides its main purposes.

In conclusion, tourism is still a integral industry to invest by developing countries. I think it has own positive effects but government should not pay attention only it and fix its problems.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4770  
Oct 27, 2021   #2
The discussion approach does not meet the prompt requirements. The discussion restatement is unrelated to the orginal topic:

Original: Many developing countries are currently expanding their tourism industries.
Restatement: ...investment in tourism industries plays as a vital role in some developing countries.

The orginal is about tourism expansion. The writer misinterpreted the focus the relevance of tourism investment. This is an automatic failing paragraph as it does not reflect any aspect of the original topic. The writer also does not produce a clear opinion based on the single point of view requirement. The essay has already failed a major part of the test at this point. It is highly possible that the writer cannot garner enough passing scores in the remaining sections to pass the test.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS task 2: Many developing countries are currently expanding their tourism industries.
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳