IELTS; Effects of Technology on traditional role of classroom teacher

Question:
The presence of technology in the classroom has become more and more apparent and offers students tremendous resources to supplemet their education.Given time, technology will completely replace the traditional teacher in the classroom. Do you agree or disagree?

Answer:

In the present age, technology is playing an increasingly important role in everyday life. Education is one of the major areas which has been heavily influenced by technology. It is refuted that technology will replace the role of teachers in classrooms. This will be proven by analyzing how teacher can cater to the day-to-day needs of the students and how they can motivate and discipline them.

A very important aspect of teaching is how the teacher can adapt the teaching style by live interaction according to the need of the students. For instance, Maths is a subject which is difficult for some students. If the student feels any difficulty in the subject, the teacher can explain the subject in detail. This flexibility is not possible with a computer as, the computer is programmed in advance.Thus, technology cannot replace teachers in classrooms.

Motivation and discipline are two factors which as very key to success in any student's life. For instance, the teacher can motivate the students by giving advices or suggesting morals from good stories and discipline them according to the character of the student.This kind of interaction is not feasible with a technology based teacher. Analyzing the above fact, it is clear that technology is no a substitute for a teacher.

Following the analyzation of a teacher's ability to provide guidance to the day-to-day demands of the students as well as their power to to guide them towards success, it is clear that technology will never replace the role of teachers in the classroom. It is expected that technology can work along with the teacher and help them in fulfilling the job of a teacher in classroom.

(279 words)

Hi Friends

Kindly read the essay and provide your comments. Has is satisfied the IELTS standards

Thanks

Well.... your prompt ask it directly from you and you need to explicitly express your personal view on the argument. So it's direct :)
Also, in modern English, passive voice is sort of discouraged though it is again important to use whenever appropriate, specially it helps a lot when we do report writing. When you use direct speech, you can express your ideas more clearly and the read can comprehend them more easily. In this task, however, I think you are supposed to express your view and I dont understand why one would say it is not a good practise.

HI,
As far as I'm convinced,one should agree with one aspect in the introduction and then write both aspects in 2 or 3 paragraphs and in conclusion again support side you chosen.

I will leave this open to make comments to all interested.

mhss.

This is a very serious question. I have asked it another thread also. As far as I understand there are two types of essays
1. Argument
2. Discussion

In Argument essay you are asked to agree or disagree and then write supporting ideas. The outline is this

Introduction(here you say whether you support or refute)
Paragraph 1 one for supporting/refuting idea1
Paragraph 2 for supporting/refuting idea2
Conclusion

In a discussion essay you are asked to discuss and then give an opinion. Here the outline goes like this

Introduction(he you must mention and idea for and idea against the topic)
Point of view 1 in favor of topic
Point of view 2 against the topic
Conclusion(here you give your opinion whether you support POV1 or POV2)

I would like to know id anybody disagree on this?