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Toefl - enforce limit the use of automobile for the betterment of our earth



sayes 8 / 11  
Apr 1, 2014   #1
Some people think that the automobile has improved modern life.Others think that the automobile has caused serious problems.What is your opinion?

Technology plays a significant role in our lives. Nowdays it is found everywhere so we cannot avoid it's influence .Automobile is one of such technology which is being used in every part of world.Some people think that the automobile has improved modern life. Others disagree. In my view, quality of our lives has decreased due to use of automobile for several One of the important reasons is that invent of automobile has caused negative impact in our health.These vehicles like buses,cars and trains produces smog, dirt which leads to air, water and land pollution.These pollutants has adverse role in our body.For example, many of my friends run in the morning to keep their body healthy.Yesterday ,I heard a news from CNN which reported on a result of research. It mentioned that runners are more likely to get exposed to harmful effects of polluted air as they breathe air saturated with toxins .These chemicals on smog are risk factors for the diseases like lung cancers,skin cancers.Though runners are only one example,every human in this earth can suffer from various illness due to automobile. This example taught me that there are some disadvantages of having automobile in our existence.

The second reason is that increasedin number of automobile has produced inconveniency in our life. We cannot reach places like office ,hospitals and other places on time due to traffic congestion. For instance,I remember last week I had my presentation in university for my final exam.It was very important for me as my overall score depended on it.Unfortunately, I got stuck in traffic jam for two hours and reached late to the university.It was embarrassing moment for me as I couldn't give my presentation though I had given my best effort.This example clearly shows that increased number of automobiles are not good our lives.

In sum,the automobile has not improved modern life. Not only it has caused serious problems in our health but it also has adverse effects in our daily activities. We all should try to limit the use of automobile for the betterment of our earth.

Pahan 1 / 1824  
Apr 6, 2014   #2
Yes, dumi is right. Your structure should help you earn a good score as well as handle time efficiently at the exam.
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1170  
Apr 6, 2014   #3
Technology plays a significant role in our lives. NowdaysNowadays it is found everywhere so we cannot avoid it's influence .Automobile is one of such technologytechnologies which isare being used in every part of world.Some people think that the automobile has improved modern life. Others disagree. In my view, quality of our lives has decreased due to use of automobile for several One of the important reasons is that invent of automobile has caused negative impact in our health(rewrite this sentence) .These vehicles like buses,cars and trains produces smog and dirt which leadsleading to air, water and land pollution.These pollutants hashave adverse roleS in our body. For example, many of my friends run in the morning to keepmaintain their body healthy.Yesterday ,I heard a news from CNN which reported on a result of research. It mentioned that runners are more likely to get exposed to harmful effects of polluted air as they breathe air saturated with toxins .These chemicals on smog are risk factors for the diseases like lung cancersand skin cancers.Though runners are only one example, every human in this earth can suffer from various illness due to automobile. This example has taught me that there are some disadvantages of having automobile in our existence.

Pay serious attention to paragraph construction and grammatical mechanics
Break this paragraph into an intro and a body paragraph.
I found lots of grammar issues and some inappropriate vocabularies.
dumi 1 / 6793  
Apr 13, 2014   #4
The second reason is that increasedinincrease in number of automobile has produced inconveniencyinconvenience in our life. We cannot reach places like office ,hospitals and other places on time due to traffic congestion. For instance, I remember last week I had make amy presentation inat the university for my final exam.It was very important for me as my overall score depended on it.Unfortunately, I got stuck in traffic jam for two hours and reached late to the university.It was an embarrassing moment for me as I couldn't give my presentation though I had given my best effort.This example clearly shows that increased number of automobiles are not good our lives.


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