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IELTS Task 2: To Be An Entrepreneur Has More Advantages Than To Be A Worker


fahmisadja 33 / 33 34  
Nov 23, 2015   #1
Some people decide to start their own business instead of working for a company or organization. Do the advantages for people working for their own business outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays, being an employee in a company does not become a choice for several people than having own business. In my opinion, although entrepreneurs need much money and look for an opportunity to build their business, they can manage freely their office hours and are able making money for their income. In addition, I do believe that a business person can help more people than the other.

The most challenge for entrepreneurs is capitals, so they may meet enormous debt from bank. Therefore, they have to effectively estimate the budget to build office, pay the workers, hire notary to legalize their business, and produce what products or services they want to engage. Another reason is to appear strong chance to improve the production that really people expected. They must seriously think about to make unique and qualify creation, promote it to public, ensure consumers, and determine attractive or competitive price of it.

On the other hand, while entrepreneurs have to invest big capitals for their business, they have privileges to manage their works by themselves. For example, restaurant owners can open their business without any enforcement. Then, they can hire someone to improve their company because they have the highest authority. Furthermore, they can make money more than their workers. Because they get a large amount of profit, they can pay the employees regularly, go around the world, and do some charities. Likewise, I do believe business person can help more people to get a job. Moreover, they can motivate others to be rich man and inspire them.

All in all, while to be an entrepreneur has more advantages than to be a worker, the great entrepreneurs will undergo the business and deal with risks and problems. However, people who have no courage to start business, they can look for a company which can safely support their live.

(308 world)

Guang 2 / 6 2  
Nov 23, 2015   #2
Hi fahmisadja,

here are some suggestions from me, hope can help me

they can freely manage
are able to make a vast amount of money(according to the context)
help more people than the others.
and provide products or services
production that satisfy people's real needs.
They must seriously think about how to make unique and qualify creation,
cater for consumers

manage their work by themselves.
they can make more money than their workers. Because they get the large proportion of profit,
business person can help other people get jobs (employments).
who balk at starting up business they can look for a job which can safely support their lives
INA 6 / 12 2  
Nov 23, 2015   #3
Hi, Fahmi
your essay is good but there just some corrections.


Nowadays, being an employee in a company does not ...

Nowadays, being an employee in a company become far more less choice than having own business for several people....
they can manage freely their office hours and are able to gain money from their income
I do believe that entrepreneurship business can help the government to reduce unemployment.


Therefore, they have to BE effectively estimate the budget to ...

Another reason is to appear strong chance to improve the production that really people expected.

Another reason is to appear strong chance for improving the productions that people have really expected ( in my opinion, it happens until today not for in the past)

They mustBE seriously think about to makemaking unique and qualify creation ...

it is better if you consider when you write with modal, we use the bare infinitive after modal verbs


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