Writing Task I about the factors which influence the happiness of spouses

A breakdown of information about the outcome of studies in level of happiness from marital status and unmarried people and the presence of juveniles affect to the happiness rate of spouses are shown in the bar charts. All in all, people in marital status have percentage are twice more the proportion of people unmarried while the presence of juveniles is unaffected to the rate of pleasure feeling for marriage spouse.

All of age range which people in marital status have the percentage more than four-ten while the happiness percentage of unmarried people below of a third and only range 65 and over has percentage at 34 percent.

However, the presence of juveniles is not affected to the happiness rate of spouse which their happiness rate more than 40 percent in all range of children although spouse with juveniles under 18 is the highest percentage of happiness rate rather than the other and they reach in almost a half.

Hello Dioba,
We met again, this is my advice for you

A breakdown of information about the outcome ... >> You can change with this sentence (The graph illustrates stage of rate happiness people who decides married and unmarried, and stage of happy couple who has children below 18, above 18, and no children )

Please make sure your writing at least 150 words, there are many grammatical error in your sentence.
and the last, you using repetitive words, you can paraphrase with other words with same meaning.

Thanks

hello dioo.. this is my suggestion for your writing. hopefully it can help you.
1. you should attach your figure owing to the fact that other people do not know data that you mean.

2A breakdown of information (...) happiness rate of spouses areis shown in the bar charts.
"a breakdown" is singular, and it is should followed by singular verb too.

3. ... status have percentage areabout twice more the proportion ...
"have" here is "verb" i think, so you do not need to put verb again