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IELTS - Writing task 1 IELTS Four social networking sites and their market share


yasabh 2 / 2 1  
Dec 12, 2019   #1

user engagement in social networking sites



A breakdown of the average time of netizens accessing social networking platforms and their market share is presented in the table and pie chart subsequently.

In the table, the Twitter users spending their time daily for twitting is the lowest one among the others with 0.6 hours, while the highest average spend is seen from Linkedin users of 1.7 hours per day. Meanwhile, netizens visiting other networking sites such as Facebook and Instagram have the average time to visit of around 18.2 and 16.6 each day consecutively.

However, most internet users have a Facebook account and actively communicate on that platform with over a half from the proportion given, whereas the second position of the market share is Twitter with 19%. Lastly, Linkedin has a smaller portion with only 11.34% of the netizen actively using that site.

Overall, although the internet users have less daily activities in accessing Twitter, the platform has the most average user visits if compared to other sites, whereas the average user engagement for Linkedin shows the reverse. Moreover, Facebook has the highest proportion of market share.



Sunrise011 7 / 14 7  
Dec 13, 2019   #2
Dear Yasin,

As a whole, your essay deals with the necessary parts of the charts, effectively using statistics. However, if I have a remark to make, it would be advising you to work more on your sentence structure. Mainly, you should avoid structures that feel heavy on the tongue or sophisticated for no apparent reason like "... the Twitter users spending their time daily for twitting is the lowest one among ..., while the highest average spend is seen from Linkedin ... "

Good Luck!
windy 2 / 4  
Dec 15, 2019   #3
1

according to my study , i usuallys put overall part after introduction and it'd better when we describe the highest number and then the lowest number can be seen from the graph , that's my opinion , goodluck


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