The graph provides information regarding the recruitment number of English & French language tutors

Percentage of first-year teacher with regular teaching jobs by year of graduation (Unit 3 Page 36)

The graph gives information about number of English-Language teachers and French-Language teachers from 2001 to 2007 in Ontorio by years of graduation. All in all, the percentage of English-Language teachers were a dramatic decrease and French-Language teachers were a slight increase.

In 2001, the number of English-language teachers stood at 75 percent and French-language teachers was 70 percent. Three years later, in 2003 there was a dramatic decrease of English-language teachers to 35 percent and decreased in the percentage of French-Language teachers during 2001 to 2003 at 70 percent to 68 percent.

From 2003 to 2005, English and French language teachers were gradual increase. Based on the graph can be seen that, an increase in English teachers were 40 percent to 45 percent. And then, French teachers were small rise from 68 percent to 70 percent.

Even though, there was grew up during three years later, between 2005 and 2007 the number of English-Language teachers and French-Language teachers were different. English-Language teachers were felt down under 30 percent, while French-Language teachers were slight increase event there was fluctuated (179w).

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Hi Reski, here is a cleaned up version of your essay. I hope you can see where I made the improvements and how you can improve your content by simply separating the information into specific sentences within the applicable paragraph.

The graph provides information regarding the recruitment number of English and French language teachers in Ontario covering the years of 2001 to 2007. The graph clearly shows that there is a marked difference in the number of English and French language teachers respectively. There was a decrease in the English teachers, while the French teachers experienced an increase during the period indicated.

English teachers in 2001 were represented at 75 percent while the French language counterparts were only at 70 %. By the year 2003, the English teachers percentage experienced a decline to 35 percent. There was also a decrease of 70 to 68 percent from the year 2001-2003 in the French teacher area.

There was a slow increase in the number of English and French language teachers fro 2003-2005. Based on the graph information, the increase in English teachers ranged from 40 to 45 percent. While there was only a small rise in the area of French teachers. The increase in French teachers only went from 68 to 70 percent.

Though there was an increase three years later. The years of 2005 to 2007 showed different digits for English and French language teachers. English teacher numbers were down to 30 percent. While the French language teachers showed a fluctuating increase of 179w.

All in all, the percentage ...

1. Your overview is already good, but it is better if you add some information about the overall. For instance turning point in 2002 when English teacher more than French teacher.

... during 2001 to 2003 atfrom 70 percent to 68 percent.

2. at .... to .....from.... to....

. Based on the graph it can be seen that,

3. It can --> It (subject) + can + be + seen (verb)

there was grew up during ...

4. was (verb) grew up (verb) . If negative form ---> was grown up

English-Language teachers were felt down ...

5. Double verb again. kalau vErb 3 ---> felt down --> diturunkan ? Passive or Active ?

French-Language teachers were slight increaseincreased slightly event there was fluctuated

6. Passive or Active ? If it's active you make double verb. if negative i think it's not appropriate with the sentence.