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IELTS - WRITING TASK 2 - hosting an international sports event is good or bad for the country


kieuthu 1 / 1  
Oct 21, 2021   #1
Please help to comment my essay. Thank you so much.

Task:
Some people think that hosting an international sports event is good for the country, while some people think it is bad.

Discuss both views and state your opinion.



It is often argued that organizing a worldwide sports event brings many good things for country, whilst others disagree and consider it is bad. In my opinion, having chance to held a international sports event helps the host country to get many benefits. This essay will discuss both points of view.

Signing up to host a global sport event is an opportunity for country to gain reputation and develop economic. Sport activities are always received attention from everyone, therefore holding a sport event will attractive a lot of people from other countries come to visit as well as introduce the culture of the country to the world. For instance, an impressing performance on opening ceremony will make global friends to remember more about country. An increase in the number of visitors will contribute to the development of tourism.

However, preparation for a big event also brings a lot of pressures for the host country. Firstly, every country which wants to be a host must invest tons of money in facility construction, such as FIFA standard stadium, athletics pool, accommodation for athletes. Secondly, during the event the host country has to effort to ensure security, this will take a large amount of labor and money. For example, organizing committee has to set up many CCTV both inside and outside the place where competitions are happening and designate a force to protect and coordinate participants.

In conclusion, although hosting an international sport event can bring both good and bad things to the host country. I still believe that if a country take opportunity to held a global festival or competion in sport, it will receive a lot of benefits because the world's interest in that event is realy huge.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 12,686 4117  
Oct 22, 2021   #2
This essay will discuss both points of view.

There is no need to repeat the discussion directions. You have already shown the examiner what the instructions are through the prompt restatements and the presentation of your personal opinion. The prompt restatement + s would get a better score without this sentence. It is non-scoring as it does not help to increase any scoring section in anyway.

An increase in the number of visitors will contribute to the development of tourism.

designate a force to protect and coordinate participants.

For each public opinion, you can explain why you oppose or support the idea. That will prevent the need for you to use a stanst alone personal opinion paragraph. This current presentation is missing your personal opinion based on the 3 reasoning paragraph thesis statement at the start. A personal insight per paragraph would have helped you somewhat meet the personal discussion requirement. Opting to use response style 2 for this essay would have preserved your final score.

Good job though. You would have been scored on 2 out of 3 required presentations.


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