Unanswered [1]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 5


IETLS; Agree or Disagree on every year several languages die out?



hisho88 4 / 6  
Jan 14, 2014   #1
Every year several languages Die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world.

Do you agree or disagree?
----------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------

One of the most important things that connects people with each other is the language. There are thousands of languages around the world and each one of them has its own history and it's own people who use it. Some languages are very old,while others are relatively new.

It is true that every year number of languages fade away for many reasons like, the decreased number of people who use the language,another reason is that it may become with no benefits for the on going era.moreover sometimes It's a political reason behind the language.

Some people think that reducing the number of languages worldwide will make our life easier.These People are looking for the incident form one perspective because language goes beyond a tool for communication, It is a history of a civilisation,a mean that has been used to communicate and also to Develop the people themselves or the region which they used to live in. So it isn't a simple thing for a language to Disappear or to die out.

On the other hand some languages are unfamiliar And don't affect a lot worldwide,in addition its local or native speakers are learning new languages because their own language history is weak and no benefits will be gained in continuing to talk and learn this language. So in this case and for a language like that, it doesn't matter for it to continue existing or to die out.

In conclusion every language is important until the native speakers of it forget it and look for a substitute for many reasons. At the moment it will die out and that doesn't necessarily make our life easier,maybe it will make it more difficult. For example when the ancient Egyptians wrote in hieroglyphs and their language vanished,we returned to it with many difficulties to understand it. So we must appreciate languages and never think simply when it comes to lose one because we may lose a huge history when we lose one language.

znack 7 / 31  
Jan 14, 2014   #2
Hi

First of all you missed your opinion in the intro

It is true that every year number of languages fade away for many reasons like

This sentence should be in the intro too.

At the moment it will die out and that doesn't necessarily make our life easier,maybe it will make it more difficult. For example when the ancient Egyptians wrote in hieroglyphs and their language vanished,we returned to it with many difficulties to understand it.

Never add new points in conclusion!

Overall,your essay does not follow any structure,so try to organize essay in 4 or 5 paragraphs.
Good luck!
dumi 1 / 6793  
Jan 15, 2014   #3
Actually, you do not introduce your topic to the reader very well. Your topic is not about classifying or defining the languages that exist in the world. It is about the case of several languages dying out on yearly basis that gives rise to the issue whether it is good to have fewer languages or not. Always stay with the prompt and do not go out of topic.
Pahan 1 / 1824  
Jan 29, 2014   #4
Well, everybody's pointing that your structure needs improvement and I too agree with them and their suggestions.
fikri 5 / 310  
Jan 30, 2014   #5
It is true that every year number of languages fade away for many reasons like, the decreased number of people who use the language,another reason is that it may become with no benefits for the on going era.moreover sometimes It's a political reason behind the language.

be careful when you try to use long sentence. try to organize well and consider the right pattern. here, I suggest to separate it into two or more sentences to make the readers easier to understand.

in third paragraph, you use capital in a wrong way. do not put capital in the middle of the sentence except the name of people or places.

On the other hand some languages are unfa

On the other hand, some languages are....

In conclusion every language is imp

In conclusion, every language is ...


Home / Writing Feedback / IETLS; Agree or Disagree on every year several languages die out?
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳