Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


the importance of Oneness


clyro 1 / -  
Feb 21, 2024   #1
Standing as one is better than one. It's better to come together in unity than to be by yourself. Aristotle once said, "No man is an island," meaning an individual can't live by himself. The importance of oneness is strong in numbers, peace and stability, and growth and development.

People are stronger when they unite. The government and the people are what we call strong in numbers because they gather to help and trust each other, and by doing that, it makes them stronger. This is why people, or us, should come together and unite as one.

We maintain peace and stability in unity. Peace and stability are pivotal to our unity because they help us prevent conflicts and show everyone's participation in particular social activities. We should always maintain peace and stability to avoid conflict that will arise in a physical quarrel.

Growth and development are also crucial to our oneness. It improves ourselves and our community; it makes our lives easier and more manageable; and it can also avoid the occurrence of social problems like poverty. Growth and development can apply to various things, such as government. If our country has good governance and if people have a good mindset and knowledge, the country will accelerate its growth and development. Growth and development are important because they help us avoid the occurrence of social problems.

In summary, being one and maintaining peace, stability, growth, and development can improve our country, our society, and our government. It'll also be easier for us to solve problems, make decisions, and test our critical thinking.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,864 4788  
Feb 23, 2024   #2
Standing as one is better than one

Better than one? One what? I think you meant to say "Standing as one is better than standing alone." Alone is an indicative word that also means one.

We should always maintain peace and stability to avoid conflict that will arise in a physical quarrel.

Restate this section. Not all conflicts result in a physical quarrel. There are times when it results in a difference of opinion only. Oneness is all about peace. While eariler references are trying to sound peaceful, this particular sentence points to a sense of violence. Try to avoid that strong reference. Maintain the zen like presentation throughout the essay.

The government

I would not refer to the government in this presentation. The people are normally opposed to or in disagreement with the government. People are normally united as neighbors though. So present that as a strong image instead.


Home / Writing Feedback / the importance of Oneness
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳