Unanswered [5] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


IELTS TASK 2 the most important thing in applying for jobs



Nhasir Rahmatia 6 / 9  
Mar 23, 2014   #1
I need your hand all to correct my essay. I need your input...

QUESTION:
The most important thing about a job is how much money you earn in that job?
do you agree or disagree?
[/i]

ANSWER:
[i]All of people need a job for earning money for surviving their life. Before working, there are many things which should be considered, one of them is money. Some people say that the most important thing is money. However, some others argue it.

Money is one of human needs. Some people say that money is the most important thing in their life because they are able to buy whatever they want by money. For example, they are able to pay their children education until high education and to buy luxurious car, house, and many others. People who think it, commonly because they think that happiness is caused by money. It causes them to consider money as the most important considered in looking for job.

However, some others argue it, because they have different views about meaning of happiness in their life. It is caused by reality around us. There are many wealthy people who have more money is not happy because they have many problem in their life. The common problem that they have is about their children or family. They have less time to mother their children caused by their jobs. They are busy to do their jobs. It causes broken home, juvenile delinquency, drugs abusing, child abusing and others. Commonly, jobs which give more money will take more time of employees.

In my view, I disagree that money is the most important thing considered in applying for jobs. In my mind, the most important thing is job environment which is comfortable with us. The second is time, we need to share our time for our family, it is important to maintain family psychology. Family prosperity will influence and go up job productivity.

In conclusion, all of people have right to choose everything in their life. It depends on our view about happiness and money, but we have to consider all sides in our life, about family, health, time and others. We have to be wise to them for better life.


Restu 1 / 1  
Mar 23, 2014   #2
All of people need a job for earning money for surviving their life. Most of people need a job to earn money ...

Some people say that the most important thing is money. some people say that the most important thing in applying a job is money.

There are many wealthy people who have more money is not happy because they have many problem in their life. There are many wealthy people, who have more money, who are unhappy because they have many problem in their life.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2 the most important thing in applying for jobs
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳