There is an increasing trend for people to live alone. What is causing this to happen?
Will it have a negative or a positive impact on society?
The extraordinary rise of living alone is among the most significant social trends of the modern world. Living alone is ubiquitous in developed, open societies, and this particularly affects health and health care. In my opinion, experiencing one has an adverse impact on society.
One possibility is that there is a causal link between living alone, being socially isolated, and feeling lonely. But these are three distinct conditions, and living alone does not necessarily mean experiencing one or both of the others (being isolated or feeling lonely). Overall, the main cause of living alone is the tendency of life, nowadays, people do not get married any more than previously. Secondly, individuals frequently spend more time studying and working, especially in civic. Research shows that Americans who are working as journalists, scholars, health care providers, and business persons usually conflate living alone, feeling lonely, and being isolated, and the result is widespread confusion about each condition.
In more detail, living alone is the consequence of isolation because of physical frailty as well as for deaths in their family and friendship networks. Thus, they have smaller social networks and less stable contact with children, and they face heightened risks of isolation if they divorce or become widowers.
The risks of social isolation depend not only on which kind of people, but also on the place people are living. Poor neighborhoods with a robust social infrastructure, busy sidewalks, and these social infrastructures suffered higher mortality rates.
At these points, most policy recommendations for reducing living alone are essential. As the population ages and the number of people aging alone grows, societies throughout the world will need to develop new supportive housing programs and new forms of elderly care.
In this sentence, I think the phrase "there is a link between..." is incorrect as between is used for 2 things but you mentioned 3 issues in the sentence.
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The second sentence is irrelevant and offers information that is disqualified from the original prompt. You could have properly presented the discussion using only the first and last sentence, and come away with a better rather than reduced TA score.
Do not start sentences with conjunctions such as "but". As a connecting word, it cannot serve a purpose at the start of the sentence. It will only lower your GRA score as it shows and unfamiliarity with connecting word rules and usage requirements. This is also a 4 paragraph essay. That said, the 2 paragraphs after the first reason will further lower your TA and C&C score as these are both under developed and not connected to the actual discussion that has been posed before you.
Your conclusion will render the essay failing as you moved from the original discussion topic, to the presentation of elderly care, which is not part of the original discussion. This is also an inappropriate conclusion as it is but a continuation of a totally different topic rather than a summary of a related discussion. This is not an essay that will get a passing score due to several prompt deviations in the presentation and GRA problems.
I think you should mention "cause" in your introduction. If so, it shows the examiner what will be discussed in your writing. As I have seen, you just rephrased the topic and mentioned "impacts". The question not only ask you about the impacts, but also the cause. Therefore, it is necessary for you to do this.
Thanks for your advice, I'll concern about it. Because I mean "a link" between many issues is a "singular connection" if the link consists of all of the issues.
Thanks a lot, Holt.
You help me a lot, I'll focus on my C&C and TA capacity in my next essays. As you commented, I'm having a problem with coherence in explaining.
... depend not only on what kind of people,
Poor neighborhoods with a robust social infrastructure... What did you refer to when you said these social infrastructures, I feel you can add more talking points here
I think the reasons could also be high living cost, fear of giving birth and rising children, love for freedom or maybe obsession from relationships in the past,... and this trend can be seen as both positive and negative at the same time.