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Is international sport releasing patriotic emotions? 'fans support their teams'


mohamedtheking 4 / 6 1  
May 11, 2014   #1
Popular events like the football World Cup and other international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opnion?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

You should write at least 250 words.
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It is generally accepted that international sporting events such as the soccer World Cup and the Olympic Games are important, because they help ease international tensions and give us the chance to show our patriotic emotions in a peaceful way.I tend to agree with this view for many reasons.In the following lines I will give reasons for my opinion.

International sporting events like the FIFA World Cup are so popular that almost all national football teams hope to qualify to it.At least thirty football teams from thirty countries participate in this important event.In addition, football fans from different countries attend the sporting event in order to support their teams.So, the World Cup gives us the opportunity to meet new people from other countries and learn about their cultures.If people from different nationalities met each other and learned about other countries' cultures, then there would be a better understanding between them and this could help ease international tensions.There would be no conflicts in our world, if peoples understood each other.

Not only sporting occasions can ease international tensions, but also they help us release our patriotic emotions in a safe way.For example, in the Olympic Games we can see athletes from different corners of the world compete for the gold medals.These athletes know well that they represent their countries, so if they win, their countries win too.They show their love to their countries in a safe way. Thus an international event like the Olympic Games provide us the chance to show our patriotic feelings safely.

The conclusion is that popular international sporting events like the FIFA Wolrd Cup and the Olympic Games are important because they could ease international tensions, and help us show our patriotism in a peaceful and safe way.

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I'm waiting for your feedback.I know that my essay is not good.I hope I could improve it.

fikri 5 / 317 71  
May 11, 2014   #2
in IELTS task, if you want to reach the higher score, you should mention the another opinion,
For example, if you agree with the statement, you should mention and explain as well the another opinion
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
May 12, 2014   #3
International sporting events like the FIFA World Cup are so popular that almost all national football teams hope to qualify tofor it.

Not only sporting occasions can ease international tensions, but also they help us release our patriotic emotions in a safemore productive and harmless way

You write very well - good grammar, vocabulary, ideas etc. However, you need to pay lots of attention to the approach. Follow the guidelines provided by me and Pahan in our above posts :)
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,198 464  
May 12, 2014   #4
Popular events like the football World Cup and other international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way.

Sports unite peoples from different corners of the world. (Hook)
For some people, sport events heighten international tensions. For some others, this is the best way to express the feeling of patriotism. Both views have merits and demerits. (Background)

However, I believe that sports have always been very important in this part of the world. (Thesis statement)

Final draft for your introduction:
Sports unite peoples from different corners of the world. For some people, sport events heighten international tensions. For some others, this is the best way to express the feeling of patriotism. Both views have merits and demerits. However, I believe that sports have always been very important in this part of the world.


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