Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
TASK 2
One of the most noticeable issues is whether the university should accept the balanced amount of each gender in all courses or not. In my opinion, I do not agree to equal the proportion of men and women in this situation.
The first major reason is that having the same number of males and females in all courses is simply unrealistic. The institution receives the number of students based on the applications. If universities want to achieve this goal, they have to receive enough applicants of each gender. Based on reality, there are some courses that are only popular with male or female students. For example, nursing tends to attract women so it is difficult to enroll the same amount of male and females students. We cannot reject a female student in favour of a male student with lower grades or lower qualifications.
I believe that every university wishes to select the best candidates according to qualifications. Therefore, each gender thinks that they will have the same opportunities to pursue their dream jobs. This is their motivation to work harder in order to gain success. On the other hand, if the number of both sexes is balanced, students will have more chance to have closer contact with people in another gender. In the future, this could become a chance to reduce the matrimonial problems.
In conclusion, the same percentage of men and women in the course at university should be based on merit. Furthermore, changing the admission enroll based on grades to gender is unfair and impractical.
Hello! @joanemily Here are my advice for you!
Based on reality However, in reality,
I think the first point of your argument is valid, however i have doubt about the second point seems like a further explanation of teh first point?
If I were you, I may point out the statement is irrational since it ignored the fact that candidates should be selected merely based on ability instead of factors like gender.
Also, it appears that you didnt include examples in your third paragraph, you better add example in your points
Holt Educational Consultant - / 15460 The opening paraphrase is short by one sentence. It does not meet the 3-5 sentence requirement per paragraph. Your concluding paragraph also has the same problem. Both paragraphs have the same purpose, to restate the prompt and discussion points in a manner that (for the opening) outlines the discussion or (for the concluding paragraph) reminds the reader of the pertinent discussion points in a summarized manner.
The discussion instruction also asks you to measure your degree of dis/agreement with the given topic. So the simple "I do not agree" should be presented instead as "I greatly oppose" or "I heavily disagree". There has to be a measured emotional response that indicates a certain strength to your belief in your response.
Great work on the first reasoning paragraph. You did even better in the second reasoning paragraph. Your ability to properly use the first person pronoun to emphasize your point will be greatly considered under the GRA marking of your essay. However, you created an under developed presentation with your second line of reasoning in the third paragraph.
There was no need to mention matrimonial problems in this instance. This part of the discussion was left hanging and unclear to the reader. What does matrimonial problems have to do with the equal number of students in every subject? Since you did not complete the explanation, the topic appeared to be irrelevant and a deviation in the discussion. While your GRA score may be better scored, your C&C score will suffer from deductions because of this unnecessary topic presentation.
I think your second body paragraph is not good enough because the reason you give is quite not persuaded. And there is a conflict in your point when you both agree and disgree in this paragraph while your main point is diagreeing with the equality of the amount of two genders. "Therefore, each gender thinks that ..."
I think your first arugument paragraph has enough reasoning and development. However, in your second arugument paragraph I do not see the link to your previous paragraph and to the topic clearly. You should add more conjunctions for cohesion and coherence points.
