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Learning english at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages. IELTSTask2

anbilli42 1 / 3  
Aug 13, 2021   #1
Learning english at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages. If these are not taught, many are at a risk of dying out.

In your opinion is it important for everyone to learn English?

Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages, and if so, how?

Nowadays, English is being taught as a first language in many schools in favour of the regional languages. Some fear that if these are not given equal representation in the curriculum, they might be forgotten entirely. I am of the opinion that an attempt to protect regional languages should be made in these communities.

First off, I feel that any indigenous language in a particular region must be included in the coursework of every grade. In addition to that schools must conduct daily readings of the news in the morning assembly by the students in that language. This can be extended to yearly events that promote the literature or cultural background that comes with these local languages. The same can be done by non-academic institutions as well. This should inspire interest among students in finding out more about their community.

Moreover, there are many endangered languages currently in the world, and a large number of ancient languages that we can barely decipher anymore. For example, the Persian language of one of the largest ancient empires is completely forgotten today. That said, we have also lost the ability to translate their texts accurately. Which leads to gaps in our knowledge of their society. Ideas and concepts that we could instead learn from are now shrouded in obscurity.

Finally, English is certainly an important language to learn simply due to its global influence on science, commerce and academia. By no means does that indicate that we must allow a local language to fizzle out of existence especially when we can prevent it.

If possible please provide an honest band score. This is my first practice essay.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,830 4781  
Aug 14, 2021   #2
The writer has not provided a direct and acceptable response to the question: SHOULD WE TRY TO ENSURE THE SURVIVAL OF LOCAL LANGUAGES? The paragraph that relates to this question presents a vague response at the most. It could use expanded discussions to help create a clearer sense of why local dialects are relevant to the country and why it should be preserved.

Questions have been provided in a specific series in the original presentation for a reason. The consecutive response presentations following the original concept creates an automatic ohesive and coherent content. Following the given format for the discussion would have ensured the highest possible score immediately in that scoring section. Being creative and mixing up the paragraph presentations can only be accomplished by writers who already know how to use transition sentences. T his writer does not have that ability yet. So the essay is not as well presented as it could have been.

There is no concluding paragraph in the essay. It is an automatic fail. Simply saying " Finally" does not create a concluding paragraph since the content of that paragraph does not provide concluding summary requirements. In fact, the explanation again, fails to fully explain why it is important for everyone to learn English.

* Contact me privately for a band score.
OP anbilli42 1 / 3  
Aug 14, 2021   #3
Thanks, for the feedback, I realise the errors, and that they were quite obvious in the first place. I'll try to improve in these areas. Also it's pretty clear to me that the band score might be around 5 +- .5 from your comments.

I have one question regarding the conclusion and how it could be presented better? It'd be great if you could give a sample, but not necessary. Maybe if I had structured the rest of it better, it'd wouldn't have seemed like a mess in the end as it is now.

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