Unanswered [15] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 4


Media should have a duty to publish only verified information and focus more on the important news


ADIE08 29 / 32 1  
Feb 23, 2016   #1
the media pay too much attention to lives and relationship of celebrities such as actors, singers and footballers, they should spend more time reporting the live ordinary people, to what extend do you agree or disagree.

Nowadays the media such TV, radio, newspaper spend much time to focus on the famous people such artist or actor, in which there are not famous people have a good ability and skill to publish. In my opinion, I tend to agree that media should make balanced information to public.

First and foremost, medias should have a duty to give each information in public is matched which is not only one side. Because the consumer of media does not come in one layer society, that there are many level people as the customer the media. For example, some Medias in Indonesia more interested give information about the hot issue of the celebrity life such as Syahrini, however in other sides only a little information from the media tell about Indonesian Inventor such the Mr. Warsito who is the inventor of medicine cancer in Indonesia whereas their knowledge very essential for Indonesian people. As a consequence, the Indonesian people has a got little beneficial information rather than the celebrity news. Finally, should the information provided to the public by the media must be a balance.

In addition, the entertainment like TV or newspaper has a moral obligation to the society that every a news their publication to society have a social education inside. For instance, media should not give information about a hot issue such artist's personal life which their personal life cannot be a role model in society. Moreover, sometimes, celebrities will not feel comfortable to publish their private life when they are followed everywhere by paparazzi. Therefore, media has the rule to give information in society true.

The aforementioned evidence shows that the mass media such as television, magazines, and online news pay too much attention to disseminating gossip of celebrities even though it is not essential to be obtained. However, ordinary people who probably can be inspiring others should have appeared in the media. Where possible, they should have the same proportion of the famous people.
justivy03 - / 2,366 607  
Feb 23, 2016   #2
Adie, I'd like to help enhance your essay by focusing on the 2nd and 3rd paragraph.
Upon reading it, I believe this is where you will be needing some modifications.

2nd paragraph
- First and foremost( this phrase, "first and foremost" is not observed in todays writing format ) ,
- medias should have ahas the duty
- to give each and every information
- into the public is
- matched which is not onlycredible and not one sided .
- Because tT he consumer
- that there are many levels of people

3rd paragraph
- every a news their publication
- provides to the society have
- a social education insidealongside of it .
- as such artist's
- personal life which their personal life cannotthat might not be a role
- model in the society.
- the rule to give information in society truethe role to be very efficient and true to what they provide the public with, information or entertainment alike .

There you have it Adie, what I notice here is your lack of association with the words with your ideas, you seem to have the idea

in your head but you were not able to transpire it in your essay. I hope this helps.
putri22 33 / 33 5  
Feb 23, 2016   #3
Hi adie, i try to restate your introduction to make it better. i hope it can help

... newspaper spend much time to focus on the famous people (...) ability and skill to publish .
In this fast-changing world, media such as TV, radio, and newspaper tend to focus on reporting famous people such as actresses or actors. However, there are many people who are not popular but have a special skill to be published. In my opinion, I strongly argue that media should expose both celebrities or ordinary people in balanced proportion.
Bunglon11 28 / 31 5  
Feb 24, 2016   #4
Hi ADIE08 Let me check your essay

NowadaysIn this contemporary era the media such TV, radio, and newspaper spend much time...

First and foremost, medias should have a dutyresponsible to give each information in public ismatched which is not only one side.

I have read your essay, you need enlarge your advance vocabularies to support your essay .


Home / Writing Feedback / Media should have a duty to publish only verified information and focus more on the important news
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳