Unanswered [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 3


TOEFL: A/D? In modern times, parents will learn more from their children



Aichen 1 / 1  
Aug 8, 2014   #1
Topic: A/D? In modern times, parents will learn more from their children than their children will learn from them.
Various opinions have been expressed regarding whether parents will learn more from their children than their children will learn from them in modern times. Some people agree with that statement; other people disagree. I have my own point of view as well. I disagree that parents will learn more from their children in modern times for two reasons.

My first reason is that parents definitely have more social experience than their children and they can still help teach their children how to deal with certain social problems in their school life in modern times. For example, if children have an argument with their classmates over an assignment topic, parents can teach them how to express their opinions with appropriate manners and guide them to get along with their classmates. Then, children will become more diplomatic if parents teach them more communication and negotiations techniques.

Another reason affecting my position is that children will make better decisions from the accumulated work experience of their parents. For instances, many young people are often in a dilemma whether they should choose the job they are interested or the job that they will get higher salary. Parents can suggest their work experiences for their children's reference, and their children can list the advantages and disadvantages of the two jobs clearly and make up their minds with thoughtful considerations. Normally, people will not regret the decision they make when they already take all conditions into account. Thus, it is clear that children will still learn more from their parents in modern times.

Of course, there is an argument to be made for other positions. Nevertheless, for the reasons that I have presented above, I feel that my opinion is the most valid.

<Thanks for readying/modifying my essay.>

Audi 2 / 3  
Aug 8, 2014   #2
Hi. Here is some small mistake.

My first reason is that parents definitely have more social experiences than their children

Also, here is my suggestion.
I quite not clear about your ideas as both reasons is related to each other. Because of accumulated work experiences of parents (reason2) and social experiences (reason1) are considered as the same thing that lead to better decision making on study, work and social life.

It would be better if you have exact two different ideas to support you position.
Example for another reason : local tradition, culture and ceremony are another reason that children could hardly learn by themselves or other sources but from parents.

Hope this may help you. :-D

Please feel free to check my essay back.
DearbhailS 6 / 9  
Aug 10, 2014   #3
Some people agree with that statement; other people disagree. this sentence can be deleted
you can just say"I have my own point as well." Because "point" is the synonym for "view".
Another The other/second reason affecting my position is....

Hope you can get good mark in ur TOEFL test


Home / Writing Feedback / TOEFL: A/D? In modern times, parents will learn more from their children
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳