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Opinions of televised talent shows - these programs are not just for consolation


Pramudita 14 / 11 6  
Oct 5, 2015   #1
Televised talent shows have become popular in many societies today.
Are these shows a good method of finding talented people, or are they just entertainment?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.


These days, talent shows on television are able to be seen in every channel then it has attracted attention of inhabitants to watch these. Some argue that these programs are brilliant idea to look for entertaining people, but others reckon that these are made just for enjoyment. I strongly agree that programs are carried out to find humans having a hidden talent.

First of all, many believe that it is only popularity shows. This is because the televised talent shows are be done only for entice many spectators to watch and it definitely can produce too much money. A case in point, a gifted even like Indonesian Idol can reap thousands of dollars. It is supported by statement of Daniel Hartono who is Director Project of Indonesian Idol; he said that it can obtain benefit up to $950,000 in one contest season.

On the other hand, others opine that the best method to detect ingenious citizens is creating televised talent programs. This is because these programs possess fair way to determine who is worthy to become a winner. To exemplify, Indonesian Idol having experienced juries do not pay attention to contestant backgrounds since they only see quality of candidate voices. Like Haris, who is a gainer of Indonesian Idol in 2008. At the past, he was only a singing beggar, but he had a fascinating voice, so that the judges gave him a high score which made him to be a winner.

To conclude, I believe that the programs of searching aptitude are used to be looking for the talent of people not just for consolation. This is because these programs will release talented generations.

vangiespen - / 4,137 1449  
Oct 5, 2015   #2
Dita, I am really proud of you for the way that you set up your introduction and thesis based upon the prompt. You presented perhaps the best argument properly supporting your stance based upon the choices given by the prompt. This tells me that your English comprehension skills are more than average and that you have an analytical mind that truly understands the question before giving an answer.

Your arguments are strong because you based them upon common knowledge and your personal opinion / experience. These are the reasons why I would consider this a highly developed essay even in the face of its grammatical errors. After all, the test you are taking will consider your English comprehension skills first and foremost, your grammar skills second. As long as you can make your point, it does not matter if the grammar is imperfect. However, that does not mean that you should not work on improving your grammar :-) Let me show you the corrections to your mistakes now.

talent shows on television are able to be seen in every channel then it AND has attracted THE attention of inhabitants THE AUDIENCE to watch these.

these programs are A brilliant idea

that it is THESE ARE only popularity shows - Shows is plural so use a plural form from beginning to end.

the televised talent shows are be done only for to entice many spectators

a gifted person who wins even like Indonesian Idol can reap thousands of dollars

Daniel Hartono who is the Director Project of Indonesian Idol

he said that a contestant can win it can obtain benefit up to $950,000

To exemplify, Indonesian Idol having experienced juries For example, the experienced judges of Indonesian Idol do not pay

to the contestant backgrounds since they only see the quality of the candidate's voices. - the apostrophe s in candidate's connotes ownership of the background.

who won is a gainer of Indonesian Idol in 2008.

At In the past

a high score that allowed him to become the winner. which made him to be a winner

I believe that the talent search programs of searching aptitude are used to

used to be looking look for the talent of people and not just for consolation prizes
irfan727 49 / 68 29  
Oct 5, 2015   #3
hello pramudita, let me try to give some suggestions on your passage.
Some argue that these programs are brilliant idea to look ...
In this case, u miss the usage of article. I recommend you to put "a"
Some argue that these programs are a brilliant idea to look ...

This is because caused the televised talent shows are be done only for entice enticing many a great deal of spectators ...
There are several corrections :
because in there, is inapropriate position. It is should be "caused"
are be done. I reckon you want to make passive voice. But, in this case you wrote double "to be"
Remember after preposition,infitive instead of gerund.
you can alter many with sophisticated word like a great deal of ... or ... a wide range of...

thanks, hope it can helps.


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