Unanswered [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


Whether parents or school should be responsible for unhealthy lifestyle of children



Maimaimaii 1 / -  
Jun 1, 2022   #1

who should take the charge of helping kids having healthy lifestyle?



In these days and ages, human society is developing positively in variety aspects of life such as technology or living standards; however, some negative problems also exist. One of that is more children have an unhealthy way of living. I believe both parents and schools have responsibility to solve this issue.

On the one hand, children today have opportunities to get access to technology devices like computers or smartphones at really young age. They often use it for watching video on Youtube, surfing the Internet or playing video games. Besides, all these activities are addictive to children, they can spend extended hours in front of screen that lead to several health problems such as eye strain and bad posture. In other words, they have an inactive lifestyle. Sadly, these problems mainly come from parents who do not impose strict rules on children and not carefully supervisor them. For example, in Vietnam most parents give smartphones to their children when they want to feed them.

On the other hand, schools are apart reason of this issue. Now, education system too focus on teaching academic subjects and children's score. Therefore, schools are lack of physical activities that cause unhealthy lifestyle at children. In addtion, I suppose that who created undesirable content or violent video games should be blamed as well because of damaging children's mental health.

In conclusion, it seems that everyone is should take charge of helping kids having better way of life. If parents combine with schools in this, we might have a dynamic generation for developing society.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15461  
Jun 1, 2022   #2
The prompt restatement does not accurately seem up the original discussion points. The mistake in the interpretation was caused by the writer expressing a personal opinion that is not aligned with the prompt. His statement totally changed the discussion topic. That is also the reason why he did not present an extent response as required. The essay has failed to meet the task requirements early on due to these prompt deviations.

The essay will receive non-passing marks in terms of accuracy while only partial scores can be applied to the remaining sections due to a non-compliant discussion presentation. Since the discussion is relevant only to the topic created by the writer, the essay cannot receive a passing score.


Home / Writing Feedback / Whether parents or school should be responsible for unhealthy lifestyle of children
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳