Ielts Writing Part 2: Criteria for schools to choose student.

Criteria for student recruitment of schools is always a difficult issue to set. While some individuals suppose that academic capabilities are the most important factor, a mixture of various capacities are obviously able to evaluate a student much more comprehensively.

On the one hand, academic ability can be good criteria for choosing students. Firstly, students, who get a good mark throughout the process of learning, are usually considered to have a high level of intelligent queries which is an essential and popular scale of assessing human potential. Besides, even above fact is not completely accurate, excellent scholastic possibilities maybe demonstrate that students have put much efforts in their studying, which is utterly an important determinant for success in the future. Furthermore, that this way of choosing student has been implemented for so long proves the valid value of this method. Clearly, using academic abilities is a rational and irreplaceable method, but it is not enough for marking students on the whole.

On the other hand, students have to be assessed by some other scales. To be more specific, each student has their own strengths and weakness, therefore, academic abilities are not the only scale to assess students. For example, some students can have some special skills or talents like singing, drawing and so forth, which no particular scale can evaluate. Besides, having students of different abilities studying together creates opportunity for them to learn from each other and mutually collaborate to make something special in the future. Obviously, the importance is that schools should have an appropriate portfolio of students, which need to ensure the development of both students' education and general schools quality.

In conclusion, both of these two perspectives are reasonable. Even though, integrated assessment method is basically necessary application for schools to choose students effectively.

There are 3 opinions that should be present in this discussion since it is a comparative discussion with personal opinion essay. The 2 public opinions must be discussed in relation to the personal opinion of the writer for each perspective. There must be a supported and unsupported opinion found within the reasoning paragraphs. The lack of perspective clarity in relation to the comparison discussion is missing throughout these presentations. More importantly, the prompt restatement + personal opinion was inaccurately reformatted for this opinion discussion. The original prompt was asking the writer to consider the division of students based on skills and learning abilities or mixed learning capacities. That was not accurately reworded in this presentation. The discussion was in regards to how to spread out the students within a classroom setting based on academic abilities, or not. The restatement was only partly correct in its references.

As such, the essay falls short of the passing requirements for this type of task. While the perspectives discussed are valid, the presentation loses the coherence and cohesiveness required for the presentation since general opinions, rather than comparative public and personal opinions, were presented. The idea representation is unclear to the reader so the essay can only be scored based on partial accuracy and under developed reasoning paragraphs.

@hklinh2792001
-"Firstly, students, who get a good mark throughout the process of learning, are usually considered ..." --> I think a defining relative clause is more accurate

--> Firstly, students who get a good mark throughout the process of learning are usually considered ...
- To be more specific, each student has their own strengths and weaknesses