Unanswered [7] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 3


Some people argue that the juvenile offenders should be treated in a similar way as mature people



Jack Lee 1 / 1  
Sep 23, 2022   #1

To what extent do you agree or disagree?



Some people argue that the youth should be acted in a similar way as mature people when they commit an offense. In my opinion, I completely disagree with this view.

On the one hand, the natural health of adolescents is inferior to that of adults. The reason is that their bodies are not wholly developed biologically as well as having to eat meals without essential nutrients in prison, which leads to a lack of sources of nourishment for the normal development of individuals. Moreover, when teenagers have to work at the same intensity as adults making them disabled. As a result, the young suffer from illness, emaciation, and even death. Thus, equal punishment has proven its harmful effects and changed the natural growth of a person.

On the other hand, the mind and mental health of immature people is not fully grown. In other words, they are not capable of being aware of their own behavior and the consequence of their own acts. This is the reason why all countries have a special court for young offenders called juvenile court. Furthermore, in sessions of this court where parents or legal guardians of teenagers who take part in illegal acts ought to present. Hence, there are different convictions that are utilized depending on the level of the cognitive process of statutory age.

In conclusion, although many people think that criminals of all age groups should be treated in an identical manner, I personally disagree with this statement due to the difference in physical and mental completion between adults and adolescents.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15357  
Sep 23, 2022   #2
This essay will only be partially scored due to the reasoning error of the writer. Since this is an extent essay, the discussion approach must be based on the reasons that support the writer's opinion alone. He has to convince the reader of the extent by which his reasoning is correct when it comes to this discussion. That means, he must approach the essay in a debate format that is indicative of why the extent of the public opinion is incorrect. He has to present an opposing side, then explain why that is wrong. For example he could say:

While I do agree that... I have to strongly disagree when they say that this is the only way to treat juvenile crime. Another way of dealing with the crime is by...

Although there is sense to the reason that... I heavily oppose this because...


See the difference? There is a clear measured response that shows the clear weakness of the other discussion. So the writer's opinion needs to clearly state this by saying:

I am completely opposed to this view due to the reasons that include (1) and (2).

By explaining the short form reasons in a measured response format, the writer will create a wholly supportive single point of view essay that adheres to his personal reasoning. In this case, only the reason that supports the opinion will get a score so the essay might fail the test due to lack of reasoning development. He cannot oppose his own opinion in the presentation by giving reasons as to why both reasons could be correct. Only the correctness of his measured opinion is what matters here.
OP Jack Lee 1 / 1  
Sep 23, 2022   #3
Thank you so much


Home / Writing Feedback / Some people argue that the juvenile offenders should be treated in a similar way as mature people
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳