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IELTS TASK 2: What are the perspectives for study abroad?



imcloud16 1 / 2  
Jun 10, 2017   #1

advantages and disadvantages of study in a foreign country



In recent decades, studying overseas has become a growing trend for many reasons. Although the trend gives students life-transforming opportunities, there still exist many limitations.

On the one hand, there are numerous advantages of studying overseas. First, living in a new country could allow students to explore new cultures. They can experience exotic foods, customs and atmospheres, which helps them to have a better understanding and appreciation of the nation's people and history. Second, studying overseas gives international students more career opportunities after finishing their study program. They return to their country with language skills and a great education, which is very attractive to employers.

On the other hand, studying overseas is not without downsides. First, although international students could contact their family and friends by using video chat applications such as facetime and skype, they do experience loneliness at some stage. For example, there are always occasions when international students miss their family, especially during holidays such as Christmas and New year, as these are seasons of spending time with family and of sharing, caring and giving. Second, fees and living costs are popular financial troubles students have to cope with. The expenses of studying abroad tend to be higher than studying locally, and even if students budget well, they can run out of money.

In conclusion, given the clear advantages studying overseas have, there are still disadvantages. Students should deliberate carefully the pros and cons of both sides before making the decision of whether or not they should study in a foreign country.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15385  
Jun 10, 2017   #2
Do, your opening statement doesn't really provide an accurate depiction of the original prompt requirement. As an examiner, I would be looking for the following information in your work: (1) the original topic for discussion; (2) whether your personal opinion is required in the discussion (3) what the discussion outline is going to be. Compare the requirements for an effective opening statement and you will see that you are failing to respond to at least 2 of the requirements. Therefore, your opening statement will drag down the score for your essay.

While I will not fault your acceptable discussions in paragraphs 2 and 3, you could have made these paragraphs stronger by opting to discuss and develop only one reason instead of presenting a number of reasons whose justification became limited within the paragraph. It is important to focus on single evidence discussions so that you can create more complex sentences because you have the time and the space to properly develop the discussion paragraphs.

I have to comment on your fourth paragraph. The closing paragraph is not acceptable as it does not provide the expected information for the concluding paragraph. There is no proper summation of the discussion using the restated prompt, points of discussion, and your opinion (if needed), all of which are required elements of a strong closing statement.
OP imcloud16 1 / 2  
Jun 10, 2017   #3
Thanks for your comment, Holt. I really appreciate it. I'll revise it.


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