Unanswered [1]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


IELTS TASK 2 : PRINTED NEWSPAPERS VS. ONLINE NEWSPAPERS



amira11545 8 / 15  
Aug 30, 2019   #1

traditional newspapers or the new media?



Some people think that newspapers are the best way to learn news. However, others believe that they can learn news better through other media. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Newspapers have been perceived as the optimum way to approach the latest news. However, in the modern world, many people hold the view that getting updated through other media is considerably effective. Although reading traditional newspapers has some benefits, I suppose that electronic sources of news are dominant.

On the one hand, it is undeniable that newspapers' content is guaranteed since it is heavily censored through numerous stages before being broadcast in most cases. Well-trained reporters are responsible for accumulating the most reliable sources to ensure that no misleading information is provided to readers. In addition to that, professional and experienced journalists from prestigious publishers can even satisfy the demands of the most critical individuals by their academic writing styles. By reading printed newspapers, many readers can enhance their reading skills, vocabulary as well as language proficiency.

On the other hand, newer media outlets are apparently superior to conventional newspapers in many aspects. Firstly, with the development of technology, accessible and user-friendly websites have become increasingly prevalent, which enable everyone to get up-to-date information only using a personal computer or smartphone. Secondly, compared to newspapers requiring several days or weeks to be available to public, Internet users and TV watchers become aware of what is happening around the world in a matter of minutes. Finally, diversity is one of the key advantages of social media over traditional newspapers. Online newspapers offer every individual an opportunity to approach various sources of information. Therefore, spectators of modern means of media are provided with comprehensive analysis from multiple perspectives instead of one-way information.

In conclusion, while printed newspapers are advantageous to a certain extent, I firmly believe that television and technologies are better for above-mentioned reasons.
( 285 words )

Maria - / 1096  
Sep 5, 2019   #2
@amira11545
Hello there. Thanks for your continuous support in the site. I hope that you find this feedback to be helpful for your writing endeavors. Please do keep supporting the platform for more input. If you have any more questions, we'd be more than happy to assist you in the future time.

First and foremost, the first paragraph lacks a bit more detail into it. Although you had laid out the fundamental details that are necessary, you were unable to establish more depth into your writing. What this pertains to is the fact that you still needed to expound, for instance, the second sentence. If you are able to do this, then you would have an enhanced outlook in the entirety of the text.

As for the body paragraphs of your essay, I recommend that you try to make concise your sentences. What this means is trying to cutting down on unnecessary texts. For instance, the second sentence of the second paragraph still needs to be trimmed down. While adjectives are great, they do not fully assist you in building the context of your writing.

What you're primarily lacking on would be the usage of concrete examples. Because you were attempting to incorporate more detail, you had missed out on adding a backbone that'll prove that your arguments are fully in tangent with what is truly concrete in reality. This is critical, especially considering that the text has to be utilized in this manner.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2 : PRINTED NEWSPAPERS VS. ONLINE NEWSPAPERS
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳