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IELTS: who should responsible for elderly?


leoking 7 / 24 1  
Oct 10, 2013   #1
[b]this is the topic question: Some people think that the government should offer financial support and care to the elderly, while others think that people should save money for their future life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion?

Nowadays taking care of elders has become a discussional topic among the whole society. Some people believe that government should be responsible for looking after senior citizens and providing them monetary supports, while others think that individual save money for the future. My view is that these two ideas do not contradict with each other.

The government should pay attention to take care of elders because senior citizens have contributed enough to the society when they were young. The government should spare no effort to improve the living condition after elders retire. To be more specific, the government could establish free nursing home, by doing so, professional staff and equipped facilities could deal with physical condition of the grey generation. Furthermore, if the elderly stay with peers, it may reduce the possibility of being loneliness.

Conversely, individuals should be responsible for saving sufficient money for their future life. This is mainly because the government has limited budget for other purposes. It is unrealistic for the elderly to totally rely on the government's pension which can only cover basic living expense, and then live in an enjoyable life. If senior citizens wish to have a decent twilight years, they must prepare a plan at early stage.

Moreover, family should also be obligated to take care of the elderly. The elderly should be encouraged to live with family, by doing so, it can enhance family intimacy. As a result, they can get rid of loneliness by spending great time with their offspring.

In conclusion, the government should definitely provide financial aid to senior citizens. Meanwhile, individuals should also save up for their retirement. But more importantly, looking after the old is the responsibility of every member of our society.

dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Oct 10, 2013   #2
Nowadays taking care of elders has become adiscussional topic among the whole society

... discussional? there is no such word :(
Nowadays, taking care of elders has become a social problem.

Some people believe that government should be responsible for looking after senior citizens and providing them monetary supportssupport, while others think that individual save money for the future

.... this is good... it's a good introduction of the argument.

My view is that these two ideas do not contradict with each other.

... this does not convey a clear idea about what position you take. You either have to agree/ disagree or take a moderate stance. Whatever it is you should express it very clearly.
OP leoking 7 / 24 1  
Oct 10, 2013   #3
thanks dumi, i will give my clear position in the conclusion, after i analyze both side
Pahan 1 / 1,906 553  
Oct 10, 2013   #4
The government should pay attention to take care of elders because senior citizens have contributed enough to the society when they were young

Good sentence ... It is even better you had more focus on the reason here because in the body paragraphs you are required to give reasons as to why you hold such position. You should also support these reasons with specific examples. Here the reason is that elders deserves better attention because they have contributed positively towards the country's betterment during their young days. So, you can start with that point and then say that government therefore should look after them well;

First, the senior citizens have made valuable contributions to the country's betterment in the past. The governments should not only acknowledge this fact but also value their contribution. Therefore any responsible government should take action to protect and care for the elders in their old age.
OP leoking 7 / 24 1  
Oct 11, 2013   #5
Pahan, you are so correct that my teacher said same thing as you. . i often come up with an idea, but unable to support very well. i try to focus on "cohesion"
Pahan 1 / 1,906 553  
Oct 11, 2013   #6
Conversely, individuals should be responsible for saving sufficient money for their future life.

On the other hand, people should act more responsibly when they are young and energetic and should save money to look after their retirement life in which they would not be physically fit enough to generate any income.

This is mainly because the government has limited budget for other purposes

... this is actually not going well with your previous idea. Here you say that it is unfair the people to expect everything from the government without contributing their share to look after their old age.


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