Writing IELTS task 1: sales of 3 shopping complexes

The chart - sales report

The chart illustrates the sale trends of 3 shopping complexes followed very different patterns over the past year with FinGroup Ltd and Man Ltd on an upward trend and Bluebird Ltd in decline.

For Fin, the year began with sales of 1 million euros, more three times as high as those of Man but they plummeted about 90% and leveled off in next 2 months. By contrast, Man saw a steady increase from 300000 to 900000 through 4 months. May experienced a noticeable recovery at Fin followed by a period of considerable fluctuation with the figures almost around 1,5 million, whereas those of Man fell mildly in May and then rose marginally about 300000 euros till September.For the rest of the year, Fin's sales took a nosedive about 90% before surging hitting the peak in December of nearly 1,7 millions meanwhile Man's ones continued picking up but with sharper level each month and also reached a record high of 16000 in last month.

With regarding to Bluebird, first 4 months observed the erratic changes but all the numbers were the highest in 3 places. Although, the best sales position was not belong to Bluebird for last 7 months. Its monthly takings kept going downhill till reaching the lowest point of over 200000 mark in July and then fluctuated wildly around 400000 until end of the year.

Hello Monleo! I kindly advise you to focus more on the trenda and lessen the statistics because all those numbers might confuse the examination. Personally, it was hard for me to follow the main trend because there was too much information. Maybe include only a few numbers and focus more on the trend?

Also, I wouldn't recommend to add information about Bluebird Ltd in the end because it belongs to the main body NOT the conclusion. It would be better if just separated the main body into 2 parts.

Hopefully, it helps :)

Hi, I found some grammar mistakes in your essay and I hope that you will find my comment useful.
1. "The chart illustrates the salesales trends"
2. "in the next 2 months"
3. "hitting a peak in ..."
4. 'With regarding to Bluebird,..."
5 " did not belong to Bluebird ..."
6. "until the end of the year"

In addition, you should include an overall trends paragraph to make it easier for others to follow your analysis.

Hi Monleo! I think you should have posted the thread with your essay. Additionally, you ought to add a paragraph or a sentence to summarize the whole idea of the chart.