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ESSAY IELTS2: separate classes in gender bases category.



hadi1981 25 / 43  
Jun 17, 2012   #1
It is better for boys and girls to study separately rather than study in mixed sex classes. They are less distracted and this leads to better results.

Do you agree or disagree with this statement?


The ministry of education in some countries is claimed to separate boys and girls in gender based classes, however they have been separated already in many others. The reason in most of the cases is to get more concentration and good results could be achieved, While others prefer to let both sexes together in all classes. Each opinion has advantages and disadvantages, I would like to explain both ideas as well as to take a middle status between them in the following paragraphs.

A good deal of research has been focused recently on single-gender classes instead of coed-gender classes. The effectiveness of the first class type achieved significant high results compared to the other especially in certain classes. Boys achieved double records in mathematics, while Girls were brilliant in arts as they recorded three to 4 times more.

The social development was affected partially in both sexes. For example, I read an article about cases of homosexuality were noticed more in single-sex classes, Rare cases of psychiatric diseases like other-gender phobia, which means afraid from the other sex relation, or Autism variation disease as the patient tend to be alone most of the time and afraid to be in group activity.

On the other hand, single-gender teachers are better also. I think it will be better to be a behavioral profession parallel to your teaching education experience. Those kind of teachers achieved better results also in all mentioned researches.

I think we can choose a middle status, as we can separate the students in the classes needed high concentration, like math, physics, and all other scientific branches, while let them together in social and other soft ones, like sport, Painting, music and similar.

In conclusion, the reason of our teaching is to get good professional persons who help in the community's development later. This achievement could be concluded by separate most of classes in gender based category as most of scientists suggested, while no offense if we keep some other classes as it is.

dumi 1 / 6795  
Jun 17, 2012   #2
The ministry of educationiI n some countries, is claimed to separate boys and girls study togetherinirrespective of gender based classesdifference , however theyclasses have been separated already according to gender in many others. The reason in most of the cases is to get more concentration and good results could be achieved(no comma ) Ww hile others prefer to letthink having both sexes together in all classesone class would help reduce misunderstandings between men and women . Each opinion has advantages and disadvantages, I would like to explain both ideas as well as totakemaintain a middle statusmoderate stancebetween them in the following paragraphs.due to following reasons;

Dear Hadi - I am happy that you have understood the essay structure of this type of task. Your intro contains the main features of that structure. Even, your body paras do not deviate from the expected structure and so does the conclusion. However, try to give specific examples to your reasons in the body paras. (the first one seems lacking such example, second one is ok :) )

However, you need to pay lots of attention to your grammar and vocabulary. In your intro, I found these issues;


The reason in most of the cases is to get more concentration and good results could be achieved

--------- I have done the correction above... do not combine too many ideas together. Keep your sentences simple and clear. Although it is not recommended to repeat your theme topic, you can get lots of help from that. Just follow its idea closely.

The reason in most of the cases is to get more concentration and good results could be achieved, While others prefer to let both sexes together in all classes.

------- remember that while is used to combine two ideas. So it has to be one sentence. However, these two ideas do not go hand in hand because you need to give a reason as to why some support mixed gender classes. Have a look at my suggestion above.

middle status

-------- this is not proper; try - moderate opinion, moderate stance

Try again your introduction and post it in this thread. As EF Kevin suggests, write the corrected sentences at least ten times again and again. That helps you memorize the correct grammar forms. :)

I hope to help you more with this essay when I get time.
Good Luck!


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