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TOEFL - Now we have so many sources of news and information



Toefler 2 / 2  
Feb 4, 2014   #1
TOPIC: Now we have so many sources of news and information that we cannot tell which one is the real one or who is telling the truth. (Media)

Generally speaking, I believe that it is impossible for people to discern which source is the real one or who is telling the lie, especially, when it comes to digital media such as internet, television.

First of all, it is undeniable fact that government's inference in the social media is considerable, which makes the truth vague. But I should admit that this is not always the case. However, government does often try to conceal the truth that does harms to them. To give you an idea, here is one good example, South Korea. It is well-known that South Korea is ferocious country; they get rid of all the politicians who are against the government and dictator. Unfortunately, people in the country are not aware of those facts. It is the government that distorts the truth that has possibility of instigating the people to fight off the government. When we see the television broadcasting in South korea, they always portray the good side and good events in their country, which makes people blind to the truth. This clear shows that sometimes people find it impossible to tell apart between the truth and the lie.

On top of that, it is true that with the development of internet, the sources flooded into our society. Therefore, people naturally started to have access to that tremendous amount of information. However, the problem is that not all the information on the internet is reliable. According to research conducted by Carolina University, researchers discovered that more than 46.5%of information posted on the famous website like Google, Yahoo is not credible. The head of the project goes on to say that this is because unlike the past, in present even the people who are not expertise in a certain field can voice their opinion with the advent of new media. This make people confused whether to believe or not. This indicates that due to the emergence of internet, people became less discernible when they look for trustful information and resources.

dumi 1 / 6793  
Feb 4, 2014   #2
You need to pay attention to your overall essay structure.
OP Toefler 2 / 2  
Feb 4, 2014   #3
dumi
Thank you for your comment!! I will try to follow the basic struture~
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1170  
Feb 4, 2014   #4
Hi toefler,

According to research conducted by Carolina University, researchers discovered

A study conducted by Carolina University discovered

the truth vague

truth is a noun, while vague here is an adjective. It should be "an adjective + a noun"

famous website

popularr website

the good side and good events

This makeS

advent

do you mean advancement ?

thanks.
SHanafi 120 / 357  
Feb 4, 2014   #5
On top of that, it is true that with the development of internet, the sources flooded into our society

Moreover, it is true that the development of internet sources flooded into our society

However, I little bit confused when read your writing
My suggestion better you make framework before you write. Then, make an syntheses into several groups and divide what topic you want to discuss in each paragraph

Introduction
body
final statement


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