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'More you sweat in your training less you bleed in war' - GRE ISSUE WRITING on children with talents



nav3057 3 / 3  
Feb 18, 2016   #1
PLZ PROVIDE INPUT AND CORRECTION

Society should identify those children who have special talents and provide training for them at an early age to develop their talents.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.Training is an essential part in developing capabilities of an individual. It makes individual ready for showing their skills and talents in exigencies. Oftentimes it is said: more you sweat in your training less you bleed in war. If an individual has any particular skillset, and trained properly, he becomes an asset. Identifying people with specific skillset at an early stage provides an upperhand. Society should identify children with specific talent, and train them to become an asset.

It is a well proven fact that grasping power at early stage is much higher than that of adults. A child lerns faster, he is curious and free of other problems. There are several cases, where adults take more time than a child like learning a new language, riding a bike or skates. Society should focus on identifying talents among children and train them accordingly. In case of sports, often the most successful sports person are those who starts training at very young age like Messi, Ronaldo, Phelps. Good players from school teams are picked up and trained, eventually this encourages them to pursue sports as their career.

Not only in the field of sports, this should be done in other fields also like science, arts, literature. Current schooling system lacks platform for children to develop their specific skills. Students are forced to study the same curriculum and then appear for exams, this routine work has killed creativity among young generation. Society should conduct programs to identify talents among children. Depending upon these specific talents, specific training should be provided along with the regular essential schooling.

However, this thing should not be forced upon children. They should be guided and motivated to pursue their dream along with realizing them of their potential. In China, several children are taken away from their homes and put into boarding schools where they are trained depending upon their skills. This has been done without the consent of children, they have been put through immense hardship. This is in a way violation of child rights, these children are devoid of love, affection, and comfort of their home.

Mianmian 1 / 1  
Feb 18, 2016   #2
The modal verb "this" in "Not only... this should be done" is somewhat vague.
"riding a bike or skates" -> riding a bike or skating
"sports person" -> sportsperson
" this should be done in other fields also" -> this should also be done in other fields


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