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Technology inventions making people socially less interactive



thanhtammm 1 / -  
Feb 10, 2023   #1
Writing:
Some people argue that technological inventions, such as mobile phones, are making people socially less interactive.

Do you agree or disagree?



It is undeniable that the revolution of technology has brought about a lot significant changes in human's lives these days, especially ways of communication. There have been some arguments as to whether these inventions negatively affect us or not, regarding to its merits as well as drawbacks. A group of individuals believe that with the advancement of technology like mobile phones, tablets or computers, people tend to become less interactive and personally, I strongly agree with this statement due to several reasons.

To begin with, some inventions of technology, especially Internet, have created a perfect place for people stay in, rather than their real world. With the advent of social media, people almost lose their ways this virtual world, where they can find range of content or information which is more suitable to their own favourite than that in reality. It is widenly seen in any public places that a silent crowd stick their eyes in their own electronic devices, without talking any words to each other. Some even tend to become addicted to these sources of distractions when they spend almost all their time in useless activities like playing online games, surfing newfeeds, uploading photos, etc. This phenomenon is no longer an astonishing situation to all of us these days. Moreover, some people are well occupied in chating with their buddies on social network, instead of hanging out with their family, their friends for get-together like they did in the past, especially in the time of COVID-19 pandamic It clearly shows that the technology revolution has resulted in people being socially inactive.

In addition to this, the great assistance from google is also a primary reason which isolates people from society. Only with smart devices, people can find almost anythings they want just through a click. If anybody has a question, they can receive their desiring answers in only one second or less, much quicklier than asking another person. For instance, to know how to solve a thorny math problem, students often tend to find the answer on the Internet instead of asking parents who may not know or waiting to come to school and ask their teachers. Or in others case, if a person gets lost, or wants to know which route to the destination, he often prefers using google maps to asking strangers. Compared to the time without modern technology, at which people were much closer to each other, the inventions have limited the face-to-face communication among people, led to their being less social interactive.

To sum up, the popularity and convenience of modern technology inventions is increasing the huge gap in communication among family and society. If oneday, people could control their usage of modern technology, or these inventions no longer played as an indispensible role as these days, people would interact more with the one sitting next to them.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15370  
Feb 11, 2023   #2
Okay, you have to learn the difference between an extent opinion essay and a simple opinion essay. Where you do not read the phrase "to what extent", that means you just provide a simple response. Without the previously mentioned keywords, there is no need to use a measured or emotional response to the question. Why is it important that you use the correct response to the question? The task accuracy uses the correct response format as one of the scoring considerations for that section. That is why you have to get it right the first time. An incorrect response format will decrease your preliminary score. So while the response is going to receive a score, it will not be a full score because the response format is not the proper one.

A further increase in the score would have been provided if you had indicated the reasoning topics for the succeeding discussion paragraphs rather than just indicating "several reasons". A strong writer's opinion is always supported by clear ideas for the discussion since these relate to the clarity of your opinion in the task accuracy consideration.

You have written almost 500 words for an essay meant to be completely discussed within 4o minutes. The result? A weakly written essay in terms of sentence structure and word usage. You even have made up English words such as "quicklier", Making up words to suit your needs never works. In this case, every incorrect word usage, every non - existent English word used, every mistake in the sentence structure, of which there are many in this esssay, will lead you to a failing final score due to low sectional considerations. Even though you wrote an extremely long essay, you will fail the test.

It will fail because it is over discussed with uncorrected grammar, coherence, and cohesive discussion errors. A task 2 essay only needs a simple 5 sentence discussion in the paragraph that shows a quick, summarized, and believable reasoning coming from the writer. One reason per paragraph is enough. You can use 2 related topics if you wish, but never write more than 5 sentences since you need to allot time to review and revise the content of your essay to gain better sectional scores.
rishabhk4896 5 / 9  
Feb 11, 2023   #3
I think this essay is overdone and you need to understand the essay type prior to plan your essay. It was totally your opinion essay but you've described it as discussion type.


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