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anialee 3 / 5  
Apr 27, 2023   #1
This is my first thread and i hope to get feedbacks

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that many cities in the world are now 'one big traffic jam'.
How true do you think this statement is?
What measures can governments take to discourage people from using their cars?

In the developing world where the population keeps climbing up at a high rate, it is important to take transportation into consideration. It is such a serious problem that people started to say that many cities in the world are transforming into 'one big traffic jam' compared to thirty years ago. In my opinion, the statement above is indeed true, as traffic jams are undeniably a huge issue.

As the world around us continues to develop, there has been an increasing need for transportation. More and more people purchase cars as a fast and convenient vehicle, but it's one of the worst contributors to traffic congestion. Unlike public transportation which can host a huge number of people at once, cars are a more private way of driving, leading to larger areas of roads being occupied by the same number of people. This can be a huge problem in metropolitans, where land is scarce and population is way too dense. People might take a liking in purchasing cars for its convenience, privacy, or probably to follow the trend of having luxury cars. The result is that many cities in the world are now facing numerous traffic jams, causing immense loss of energy, time and producing tons of greenhouse gasses.

In order to deal with the consequences and prevent further exacerbation of the concern, each of the citizens would first need to educate themselves on the matter. The government can also play a vital part in the management, by enacting different laws. There should be a higher fee towards private car owners, as well as a more affordable pricing for public transportation tickets. In some regions of the world, governments have also lent out bikes, which helps reduce traffic jams, protect the environment and enhance their citizen's health.

In conclusion, there is no doubt that roads are being overcrowded. There should be immediate measures to cater for the situation, ensuring a higher quality of life.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,830 4781  
Apr 29, 2023   #2
In the developing world where the population keeps climbing up at a high rate,

Points are always deducted from the prompt restatement + writer's opinion section for every piece of information you add, as the writer, that is not supported or mentioned in the original presentation. Expect to get a failing preliminary task accuracy score for these additions to the restatement.

'one big traffic jam' compared to thirty years ago.

This is not a revised presentation of the original sentence. This is just a rearranging of the same words, which will be considered plagiarism and result in additional deductions.

the statement above

You do not need to indicate the position of the original statement. Just directly state if it is true or false.

What measures can governments take

You forgot to directly respond to this question in the writer's opinion paragraph. Your task accuracy with regards to that section will be considered incomplete.

As the world around us continues to develop

This paragraph does not have a point.

each of the citizens would first need to

The question was about government action. That should be the anchor sentence for this paragraph. The actual response cannot be a secondary reference.

The essay is over written at 353 words. The task 2 essay can only accomodate 300 words at the most during the 40 minute writing time due to writing finalization requirements.
OP anialee 3 / 5  
May 2, 2023   #3
I am so grateful for the reply, i seek to improve in the future.
Ngan555 1 / 2 1  
May 3, 2023   #4
metrolotians: i think it's a word to address people not" very big city". You can use" metropolis" instead

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