This is my first time preparing for TOEFL ibt, never took a class or anything before, and wanted to know what kind of grade my essay would get.
I thank you for any feedback, positive or negative. Any opinion is welcomed.
Question: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Universities should require students to study many subjects in different fields rather than just their major subjects.
Most modern universities require freshmen to take a wide berth of introductory courses, ranging from physics to literature. Yet, this is an inefficient method, and one that needs to change. That is why universities should not require students to take introductory courses from various fields rather than just their major subjects to make students happier and more ready for society.
First, universities should not require students to take subjects from many different fields because it will make students more depressed. The reason for this is that most students already know what they want to study before they enter university. They took a broad range of subjects already in middle and high school, and should be given the freedom to take the courses of their choosing. If they are not given this freedom, the required courses can create a great burden on the students. For example, most universities require that all students take a year of calculus in their freshman year. Yet in many cases, it is pointless to study calculus. A literature or music major should be given the option to study poems or symphonies, rather than derivatives or integrations. Such students will be more tired and depressed, as they are required to take challenging courses such as calculus, when their interests lie in a very different major. That is why universities should not require that students take introductory courses from many different majors.
Additionally, universities should not force students to take rudimentary courses in different subjects because it will actually hinder a student's preparedness for society. Students already experienced classes forced onto them during elementary, middle, and high school. University is the time for students to explore their own interests and grow as a human. Giving students the freedom to choose their classes will give them confidence in themselves and more independence, which in turn will better prepare them for life after graduation. After university, students will enter the workforce, in many different fields, and having confidence in one's ability to choose for one self will give these students a head start in whatever field they enter. That is why students should not be required to take basic courses on different subjects.
Although there are many positives to banning required basic courses about many fields, there are some people who would argue otherwise. They may state that such courses will teach students to be better-rounded or that most students do not know what they want to study. But this is false. Such courses perhaps may make a student better-rounded, but the burden and stress it gives is much more detrimental. The trade-off is not worth it. Also, the truth is, most students enter university knowing what they want to study. And for the students that do not, they have the option to take the introductory courses. The argument is not for banning these classes altogether, it is for not making such classes mandatory for all students.
Universities would be doing a disservice to its students by making basic courses on various subjects mandatory. This will just lower student moral as well as not prepare them for life after graduation. If universities allowed students to choose the courses that they want to study, they will enjoy college life as well as learn from it.
Well... your essay looks pretty lengthy. It's good if you can manage completing it well within the allowed time frame. Otherwise, you'll be in trouble. :)
Most modern universities require freshmen to take a wide berth of introductory courses...
.... here you sound a bit contradictory .... first you say that unis require students to take up subjects in other fields and at the end you say they do the oposite. It tends to confuse the reader.
I think the best approach for you is to give reasons as to why you do not agree with the statement and support them with more specific examples. Mind your time too :)
Pahan has raised a good point. Yes, you need to handle time very well and I think this is a bit too long for this task. Again, if you can finish it within allocated time, then it's fine.
I also feel that you better pay attention to the essay structure.