The use of social media is replacing face-to-face contact for many people

substituting in-person communication with social media

The increasing usage of social media platforms has resulted in the decline of face-to-face contact for human's communication in everyday life. This essay will argue that the advantages of this phenomenon are eclipsed by the disadvantages involved.

It is undeniable that social media can be advantageous to a certain extent. The first reason is that social media platforms offer instant and convenient connectivity as they enable users to maintain relationships across distances. For instance, by using Facebook Messenger, individuals can stay connected with their family members or friends who live in another country. Furthermore, social media supports self-education learning by allowing people to hone in what they want to read or what they are truly interested in. However, material on the Internet is untrustworthy enough to rely on because social media enables a whole new way to publish and share without any regulation or editorial standards.

In my opinion, social media services can bring about some negative effects which outweigh the aforementioned benefits. Perhaps one of these is that since people start to communicate through screens and text, it is difficult to sense interest or emotion from another person. This is primarily because emotions & feelings are not easily expressed with simple text messages. Another drawback of regular social media usage is that given the addictive nature of social media which may lead to decreased real-world social engagement. As a result, these people may suffer the feeling of isolation, and a lack of human connection, which can have a severe impact on their mental health.

In conclusion, substituting in-person communication with social media may offer benefits in some situations. However, I believe that this phenomenon is, on the whole, more disadvantageous.

Avoid generalized opinions. This will not receive a good score because you are avoiding a direct response to the question. You are being asked for your personal opinion so use the personal pronoun I to indicate your thoughts and reasons. The paragraph is also missing a summary of your reasons for your opinion. These problems will result in a nonpassing TA score.

Discussion reasoning is also weak and mostly incomplete. You should be presenting the pros and cons of the opinions in your discussion. That means you have to prove that the advantages are really disadvantages instead. You did not do that in this essay. Your discussion paragraphs are not connected properly. There is a lack of proper transition between ideas and paragraphs.