Unanswered [2] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 4


IELTS: The wealth gap between 1st world countries and 3rd world countries



Gulala 3 / 7  
Nov 30, 2013   #1
Hi everyone! I have some doubts about essay's structure... i think it is problem solution but i'm not sure. please help me...

The wealth gap between 1st world countries and 3rd world countries seems to be increasing. How can we reduce this gap? Do you think that developed countries

have a duty to assist developing countries in every way?


It has become apparent in recent years, that economic disparity between prosperous countries and the bottom layer of poor and overpopulated periphery significantly increases. The growth of globalization, careless attitude from wealthy countries, and many other reasons have led to the degradation of poor countries. It is my belief that the solutions for decreasing wealth gap are the responsibility of 1st world countries, because of historical causes. Therefore, I feel that developed countries should assist poorly developed states in all respects. (In this essay the arguments surrounding the problem of 3rd world countries will be examined.)-should I include or not?

First of all, rich countries should not forget about their aims, videlicet they should help developing countries unselfishly. That is do not demand and compel poor states to repay debts, because having a huge arrears will not improve their situation. However, such policy will lead to the decreasing economy of developed countries, but it will be hugely compensated by the benefits which 3rd world countries will receive.

Secondly, I think that developed countries should improve the education in poorly developed countries, that is provide a generous scholarships for tuition in western top universities. For instance, now the USA devotes a full grants for students from African countries, thus improve the economy and developing African countries.

I firmly believe that developed countries have an essential duty to help non-industrialized countries. Because now, countries which did not participate in Cold War on rush of armaments have an enormous difficulties with economy and standard of living. One can not but mention the fact that in Africa, for instance, the level of famine is the highest in the world. So, by this reasons wealthy countries should support poor states.

To sum up, I think that 1st world countries should assist and balance the situation in developing countries and only then they will live in a happier, healthier and rich society.

duo008 6 / 20  
Nov 30, 2013   #2
It is my belief that the solutions for decreasing wealth gap are the responsibility of 1st world countries, because of historical causes. Therefore, I feel that developed countries should assist poorly developed states in all respects.

you didn't give a solution,
because of historical causes, give a example?

I think you can say, the gay between 1st and 3rd world countries because:
1. population
2.culture
3. politics
4.technology

First of all, rich countries should not forget about their aims, videlicet they should help developing countries unselfishly.

why rich countries should help poor countries? It's really confuse me. because you did't have any particularly examples to explain your opinion.
OP Gulala 3 / 7  
Dec 1, 2013   #3
thanks a lot, duo008
but I asking what the structure of this essay, as I wrote i don't know what the type. opinion, discussion or problem&solution... i can't understand... can you suggest me a plan?
dumi 1 / 6795  
Dec 1, 2013   #4
It has become apparent in recent years, that economic disparity between prosperous countries and the bottom layer of poor and overpopulated periphery significantly increases.

.... let's take this hook statement. I find this has a powerful idea, but it is not presented clearly. Rather it sounds too crowded with words. You have to display your vocabulary knowledge, but you should not overdo it. The most important thing in essay writing is that it should have clarity. Then only it would be interesting for the reader to read.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS: The wealth gap between 1st world countries and 3rd world countries
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Need professional help with your assignments? Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳