As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. Do you agree or disagree?

It is acknowledged that, besides earning money, enterprises also should be concerned about the public and have community responsibilities. Personally, I completely agree with this view.
The most frequently cited reason is that their activities could impact on the environment and citizen's life. This is because manufacturing businesses often use toxic chemicals which produce and make a product, then they release hazardous waste and emissions into the environment. These lead to environment pollution and especially water resources pollution. It directly affects the life of local people and it can cause many serious diseases for citizens such as cancer, pneumonia and dermatitis, therefore; they have to have responsibilities with community and local people. For example, a manufacturing company in An Duong industrial has to install a wastewater treatment system and have a river cleanup campaign annually, this helps businesses could limit waste affecting environment and inhabitant.
Another reason for this opinion is that local enterprises should help and create more job opportunities for people in the area. Businesses contribute to the financial development of locals and they also receive the support of local government, hence; they should have policy and employment opportunities which can help poor people in the locals. This helps limit and reduce the rate of joblessness and improve the life of citizens.
In conclusion, for the reasons I have mentioned above, I think that businesses activities have a significant impact on the environment and the life of inhabitants. Therefore, it is advisable that enterprises should have responsibilities with the community.

This is not acknowledged in the original prompt. It is an idea that is implied and is therefore, up for discussion and debate. You have altered the discussion parameters and changed the discussion focus with this incorrect restatement. The TA preliminary score for the paraphrasing will be a failing one.


This is not an extent response essay. This is a simple single opinion essay that relies on an easy yes or no response to the question. The response delivered is not the expected one. The lack of summarized writer's opinion reasoning will also create a low score for this aspect of the introduction paragraph. I am afraid the essay has already received a failing score by this point.

The paragraphs are difficult to read because of the lack of proper spacing in the presentation. The reasoning is acceptable as it remains within the required 2 supporting reasons for the writer's point of view. However, the summary conclusion is difficult to read due to the lack of proper thought presentation.

Most of the paragraphs are composed of run on sentences. You need to learn to create more concise presentations and allow your ideas to come across clearly without an over explanation. This is most important when presenting the summary conclusion to the reader.

Overall, this is a good attempt at a task 2 single opinion essay. However, improvements can be made to help you achieve a passing basic score. Right now, I do not believe that this essay would receive a passing mark during an actual test.