Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 7


Both Working parents and problems faced and how does it effect family



sreddy 1 / 3  
May 13, 2014   #1
In todays world with steep increase in prices women around the world have started working and contribute to the income of the family.This is quite evident in cities. While its good both parents contibue to meet expenses, it has problems which I would highlight in the following paragraphs.

While both parents are long gone for majority of time during the day there would be no one to mpnitor the activities of yound children. First of all one of immediate problme would be that parents would have no idea of how a child has been performing in acadamics and by the time they would realize it would have been very late. Secondly, it one of the serious concern is the security especially if you havea children less than six years. In a recent instance there was bulgary in apartment in our area where in robbers not only stole everything they also have killed the child who was very young.

Also while the parents are gone and if there are teens there is a good chance that the place can become a mess where in freinds of these yound adults may com edown and may indulge in aweful activites which include coming under the influnce of alchohol, smoking and drugs. Once addicted to these kind of habbits they may also indulge in crimes to make a quick money. In recent past may chain snatchers nabbed in the city are children in teens who have come under the influnce of above habbits.

In some cases children area also addicted to internet or watching television excessively casuing serious health issues. In recent suvery chilren as yound as four years are diagonised with eye sight.

Lastly, not to forget about online crime where in often children get in touch with strangers and may be exploited in one way or other. Last month a young girl met a man online and when he asked her to meet personally, he kidnaped and assaulted her.

In my opinion though its good for both parents to work, it is always good idea to keep track of things at home, a special attention needs to be given to children in particular.

ammus1 10 / 29  
May 13, 2014   #2
Hai friend, , please write the prompt and the purpose of writing. You have to focus on sentence structure and punctuations.
OP sreddy 1 / 3  
May 13, 2014   #3
Thank you. I missed the main point of essay. The topic was to discuss the problems faced by children.
dumi 1 / 6793  
May 14, 2014   #4
Hai friend, , please write the prompt and the purpose of writing. You have to focus on sentence structure and punctuations.

...Yes, this is very important. We need to know for which purpose (IETLS, TOEFL, Classroom assignment etc.) you wrote this essay and what is the full prompt of the task. These information help us align our feedbacks more with the task requirements and you would find them more meaningful :)
OP sreddy 1 / 3  
May 14, 2014   #5
Hello. Yeah, going forward I will make sure its included. For the essay above its for IELTS task #2. Here is the actual topic . Earlier I tried to copy in the subject but it did not work,

--------
Its quoite common for both parents in a family to work SOmtimes this is becaseu they need two salaries to survive whereas at other times its is their choice.

What problems do you see in this situation how does this effect the children and family life
Pahan 1 / 1824  
May 14, 2014   #6
WhileWhen both parents are long gone for majoritynot around for most of the time during the day there would be no one to mpnitormonitor the activities of youndyoung children. First of all, one of the immediate problmeproblems would be that parents would have no idea of how a child has beenabout how their children performing in acadamicsstudies and by the time they would realize it would have beenbe toovery late.

You have lots of spelling errors :(
OP sreddy 1 / 3  
May 14, 2014   #7
Thank you Sir. I will make a note of them.


Home / Writing Feedback / Both Working parents and problems faced and how does it effect family
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳