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Writting task 2. The best way to solve the world's environmental problem is to increase the cost



Trang1711200 1 / -  
Mar 28, 2024   #1
A school of thought claims that the most effective solution to alleviate environmental deterioration is to raise fuel prices. While this may yield some short-term effects on the environment, I would contend that raising people's awareness is far superior when tackling these problems.

It is understandable why people advocate increasing fuel charges. Given the state that fuel-driven vehicles such as cars and motorbikes are currently in universal popularity, the rise in fuel prices is expected to cause people's tendency to go for other eco-friendly substitutes, which curb the amount of greenhouse gasses emitted. This inevitably could mitigate the dire environmental pollution as well as related issues such as global warming. Another important point is that because the given solution could restrain people's usage of fuel energy, such demands for fuel may be decreased.

However, I believe that raising people's awareness is a more sustainable option to combat the problems as it seems to be more effective in the long run. In fact, there are many reasons for the environmental problems, for instance, extensive plastic use in shopping habits or overuse of pesticides in farming has caused tremendously detrimental effects on the ecosystem. Therefore, the authorities should establish global campaigns that encourage consumers to adopt a green lifestyle and issue laws to restrict the amount of noxious chemicals being used in agriculture.

In conclusion, despite the unequivocal upsides of raising the fuel cost, I subscribe to the view that it is not the optimal way to do away with such problems.

This is my homework for ielts class, however, i do not know what band it is now. Can somebody recommend some other phrases to upgrade it? Thank you for your help

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15388  
Apr 2, 2024   #2
The essay discussion is based on the extent of your (dis)agreement with the provided discussion. It is not based upon how the problem should be dealt with. Therefore, the premise of your discussion is faulty. It is not based upon the expected response format. Therefore, the first paragraph is not going to receive a failing score. It is not going to get a preliminary passing score because the writer's opinion does not meet the discussion response requirements. The task response is inaccurate. The overall discussion format is also incorrect. This is a single opinion essay that should be defending the extent of your reasoning response. By using a comparative format, it becomes clear that you did not understand the writing instructions. The essay is not going to pass the test.


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