[IELTS WTITING 1] the problems faced by children in two primary schools in 2005 and 2015

Please give some feedback about my writing. Thank you a lot!

The table describes data about the percentage of children in two elementary schools who had educational issues in two years 2005 and 2015.

Generally speaking, school A's students encountered more problems with education than students of school B, but the proportion of school A's students dropped significantly in 2015 compared to 2005.

In 2005, we saw a huge gap between the percentage of two school's students with educational problems. Most noticeably in following instructions issues with 36% higher belong to school A, other problem areas such as concentration in lessons, verbal expression of ideas, listening skills, spelling, handwriting, and reading ability gap around 20 to 30 percent.

The figures for 10 years later witnessed a dramatic decrease in the percentage of school A's students, except for two areas reading ability and handwriting which remained roughly the same. There was a moderate drop of 5% in the spelling area, and a substantial fall of around 15% in the remaining fields. The number of students in school B who struggled with educational issues remained nearly the same in 2015, except for two problems spelling and following instructions which doubled in the period shown.

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There is an error in the trending statement presentation. It is unequal in consideration seeing as how the writer referenced highs and lows for School A, but not for School B. This lack of balance creates an underdeveloped trending statement. It would be better to remove the School B reference or, create the same reference point for School B as well. Remember that the trend always signifies 2 areas of measurement, the high and the low. In this case, a reference to both schools, for some related or connected purpose would have been best.


Never use personal pronouns in a task 1 essay. This is a general reporting task that cannot contain any form of bias reporting. Hence the need to omit pronoun usage. Additionally, the assumption is that the reader cannot see the image and therefore, should not be asked to look at or, assume that the reader can see information coming from the image.

The writer has a few sentence structure problems here and there but none that will cause a significant GRA deduction. The information written is still understandable to a native English speaker. That does not mean that he should not work on further improving his sentence formation skills though. The less errors he makes, the better his GRA score will be.

Thank you som much sir @holt