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Yearly collected data of kids whose Australian mother is 40-44 years old - statistics since 1981


ainunazwaria 10 / 18 5  
Oct 30, 2016   #1
WRITING TASK 1 - NUMBER OF CHILDREN EVER BORN TO WOMEN 40-44 YEARS

The table presents the collected yearly data of kids who was born to women aged 40-44 years in Australia since 1981. Overall, it is clearly seen that proportion of women with three or more kids experienced downward trend, while the reverse proportion appeared to women with no kids or one and two kids.

To began with, either percentage of women who had three kids or four kids above showed a downward trend since 1981 up to 2016. The percentage between the two categories had slight difference at first ; at 27.4 % and 27.6 % respectively. Yet, wide gap of percentage occured in both of categories in 2006. However, a sharp decline percentage experienced by women who had four or more kids.

I
n contrast, the three others categories experienced a upward trend. Either proportion of women with no kid or one kid increase gradually in almost twofold from former's percentage in 1981. However, women who had two children pierced the highest percentage over four other categories during 1981 to 2006.
sydneynguyen 6 / 16 2  
Oct 30, 2016   #2
Dear Friend,
You wrote: ...the three others categories experienced a upward trend.

Feedback: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
ifraanisa05 44 / 70 6  
Nov 1, 2016   #3
Hai ainun, here are my thoughts for you

first of all, you need to upload the table and the question so that people can give you suggestions for your task response

... collected yearly data of kids
it will be safe in writing ielts if you use the word 'children'

To began with, either the percentage of women ...
... the two categories had a slight difference

... others categories experienced aan upward trend.
i suggest you to put the trend in overview


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