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Posts by Mustafa1991
Joined: Jan 31, 2009
Last Post: Jun 2, 2015
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From: United States

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Mustafa1991   
Feb 24, 2009
Research Papers / The Psychological, Physiological, and Neurological effects of Marijuana and Cocaine Use in Humans. [34]

Look, I'm not presupposing or begging the question on anything. The writing is on the wall in bold red letters, it says that drug use even sparingly, much less what is characteristic of a psychological dependence, is harmful to your health and longevity. Now, what you're arguing is that people should have the right to choose for themselves if they want to accept those risks because they're outweighed by the unique, personal benefits that they have for the person; even if it means they don't live as long, at least they live great while they live.

Do you see the problem here? You are arguing from a position of morality on the superlative of life on a personal level, as a person who will readily admit that ideally, if they could have it their way, they wouldn't be psychologically dependent on the drug.

A drug user's definition of "good" or "benefits" is highly questionable because it's from a position that could be deconstructed if I were to use a circumstancial ad hominem argument.

Really, that argument would be appropriate in this circumstance though, because most drug users themselves will tell you that this is not the way they would have it if they were making the rules. They are playing drugs as an improvisation due to some causal, personal deficience after the fact.

So, although this is an extreme example, it's similar in principle to a person who has a gun to their head and would rather die than be raped by whatever deficiency, real or perceived, that they feel is a part of them.

Take the latter away, and do you think anyone would choose objectively to be shot?
Hell no.

This is not about someone for whom drug use is an occasional trinket in light of their important life values.
It is about the person who for some reason or another, cannot function without drugs. They are psychologically dependent, and any argument they make that the "benefits" outweigh the drawbacks is nullified on two accounts, one that no one will take them seriously, which is incidentally a function of the second account, the same reason for which they will openly admit, this is not how they would have it, and frankly it's not how anyone would have, or envision it, in the beginning.
Mustafa1991   
Feb 23, 2009
Research Papers / The Psychological, Physiological, and Neurological effects of Marijuana and Cocaine Use in Humans. [34]

With regard to the psychological effects I wasn't referring to the euphoria and bliss that are sought out through drug use, as much as I was the pervading reasons at heart why a statistically important percentage of the population cannot function sober, without them. You know what I'm talking about, those people who can't go a day or a week without alcohol or marijuana, or whatever their crutch is. We are not stupid; we know the temporary utopian effects which accompany drug use. The real question is, why is it that a statistically disturbing segment of the population, more in some countries than others but all throughout still, cannot live for extended periods of time without a xanax bar or alcohol, or other drug, even when their lives have ample opportunity for moderate, nevertheless profound, sensible pleasure seeking habits. You can try to advance an argument that ordinary citizens are just trying to get a piece of the ultimate pleasure that no one can deny them, but that argument, although it becomes stronger when you compare drug use in the projects to middle class citizens, ultimately falters when you look at the elite who can pay people to paint a portrait of them of them for the rest of their life, have unlimited conventional pleasure, and seem at least on the surface to be well-rounded and mentally healthy, but succumb to extreme habits and destuctive diversions, all as a function of man's never ending desire and insatiable nature that I think, invariably comes back full circle to the question of life vision or purpose. Man cannot escape his inquisitive nature, no matter what the superficial circumstances that surround and appear to become a part of him. I was going to pursue that dynamic, of course at the same time trying to relate it to the effects of the drug.
Mustafa1991   
Feb 21, 2009
Research Papers / The Psychological, Physiological, and Neurological effects of Marijuana and Cocaine Use in Humans. [34]

Thanks for your suggestions, I've fixed those mistakes accordingly. Also, I decided to drop "psychology" from the topic because it adds another aspect which is too much for me to address without losing my mind. If behavioral psychological points come up then great, but I'm not going to devote so much time to it. I've started briefly on Marijuana. Let me know what you think.
Mustafa1991   
Feb 21, 2009
Undergraduate / Georgetown - Somalian Pirates [8]

Misnomer would rightly apply here if there was not a documented pattern of misuse having not so much to do with pirates in this case, but an overreach that is self-perpetuating and indicates this probably isn't the first and last time it happened, and more to the point, it is in many cases a deliberate misuse for the reasons I've already illustrated. But notice that I said it was possible his intent was not malicious, which is why I took appropriate action to clarify for him that he is engaging in something that he may not even be realizing.

It's partly my fault at the end for muddling what I was trying to say. His essay is grammatically intact. It is well written.

The content is not amusing; it is riddled with untoward errors and has few clearly defined methodologies for combating piracy. This is of course self-evident when your major premise is that evicting the "militant islamic government" will result in the abation of piracy.

Major Point: These are not merely happenstance errors. They are not isolated mistakes. They are clues to a sickening ideology.

Let's hold all things equal. Imagine for a second here that we live in a world we are all stupid and know nothing.

What are the odds that you make the mistake that removing something will cause the exact reciprocal effect which it does in reality?

Plausible you say.

What about when these are two distinct matters?

This is NOT someone who has never heard of peanut butter and jelly before, saying that removing peanut butter might make it taste good, all things equal.

These are complex interactions on a much higher scale, which makes it even more unlikely that he made an innocent mistake.

What makes it infinitesimally unlikely, it it wasn't already?

This is your Undergraduate Admission Essay, and this is an issue you are supposed to care about theoretically.

With the control that we know nothing, making the exact opposite mistake on two things you had no prior experience with is unlikely.

When these things are intangible and not proximate, it is even more unlikely.

When you misuse the word terrorist in the same page, it is extremely unlikely

Add the final consideration that this is his undergrad adm. essay, this point is his central tenet, and this is supposed to be something he cares about, and my case is complete.

I don't even have that much of an interest in the piracy, but I had managed to know by occasionally reading current events, that when the Islamic Government was in power, piracy was not an issue.

Just a few final points. Of course I didn't intend any disrespect to Michael, Kevin, or anybody else.

I made a legitimate point that if you are an admissions officer, and you are reading these essays about what the applicants think are important issues, and you are so imprudent that you fail to see they've made a very serious error which throws a pile of festering defecation on, and makes a mockery of the word "important" and their assertion that this is important to them, you deserve to be called a "completely incompetent idiot" in all respects.

Again, please let me reiterate that whether Michael has consciously chosen to attack or wrongly associate negative connotations with a religion and way of life for 1.2 billion people is up in the air. I meet a lot of people who don't even realize that they are proliferating something that is so damaging and seditious. It IS personal. It IS offensive.

But I am open minded, so of course I give him the benefit of the doubt that it is unintentional, but also I try to rectify the situation by making it very clear that he might be engaging in something extremely deleterious without being aware of it.
Mustafa1991   
Feb 20, 2009
Undergraduate / PSEOP Admission Essay - post secondary essay (every ounce I have) [8]

4th line - Medical school requires a lot of time and effort ... and I am willing to see to it that I give it my best.

5th/6th line - ... college atmosphere, for the respect, added responsibility and increased difficulty, and to gain an appreciation for what college life is like.

7th line/point - starting off with "the first reason" "second reason" ... is something you will hopefully outgrow at some point in your academic career. It's better to start explaining the reasons without first saying redundantly, "this is the reason". Just do it!

7th line - As an example: Due to some key structural differences, college can present unique obstacles for a student who has just graduted from high school. Particularly striking is the relative autonomy in college, which is in contrast with high school, where you must ask for permission to use bathroom and are forced by strict rule to attend classes. In high school, a student's final grade is usually a composite of many different kind of assignments, including homework, quizzes, tests, projects, and class participation. This allows for greater indiscretion because missing a few assignments won't devastate your grade. In college however, the final grade in many classes consists of fewer than 5 grades, mainly papers and tests. Missing one assignment in some classes can relegate you to the brink of failure. This magnifies the importance of each assignment and reflects the very serious nature of college in comparison with high school.

It's yours from here; there are so many differences you can write about but those are probably the most important.

The parent teacher interaction in high school is nonexistent in college. You're a responsible citizen who is capable of making his own decisions. College It's much more serious in academic standards ie probation, etc etc I prefer college over high school any day with regard to its grade structure and autonomy.

High school is a joke, the kind of environment that impedes your growth and squanders your intelligence. I'm glad I saw that before I wasted 2 more years of my life doing nothing.
Mustafa1991   
Feb 20, 2009
Undergraduate / common app short answer- macaroni penguins [4]

This is a start, and I don't think it alters the meaning much, if at all.

"That's a lemur!" four-year-old Claire proclaimed. I was astounded; I had read this book to six and seven year olds many times, but none had shown such precociousness. She flipped page after page and pronounced all the animals, "Lemur, leopard, llama, macaroni penguin, manatee..." Wait, "macaroni penguin"? Four-year-old Alexis would have been excited that Kraft was expanding their shaped noodle spectrum, and this little girl knew them by picture. CONFUSED?

Read Aloud doesn't seem exciting on the surface -- spending an hour or two reading Clifford the Big Red Dog, or whatever books I had in my bin that day, but it was! I liked it from the beginning; but it was kids like Claire that made me love it. Every week that I went to the Delaware State University daycare, I was eager to see my kids and watch their reading skills improve. It is true what they say, small children's brains are like sponges, and it was exciting to watch their growth and to have been a part of it. I don't think that I could ever be a teacher, but volunteering with my Delaware State kids made me appreciate the job a little more than I already did, and now I know what macaroni penguins are too!
Mustafa1991   
Feb 20, 2009
Undergraduate / Georgetown - Somalian Pirates [8]

"Pirates have used the oceans to exert control over peoples for over twelve-hundred years"

Although technically that's correct, pirates are definitely known to have operated as far back as julius caesar. That's at least 2,000 years.

livius.org/caa-can/caesar/caesar_t01.htm

"However, the recent terrorist attacks inflicted upon unwary ships off the East African coast by Somali pirates have shocked both the public and the international community."

Either you are being intentionally inflammatory, or you are just another prototypical example of a person who has unwittingly incoporated into the vernacular, duplicitious, incendiary language that is used haphazardly and especially to further the elite interests of those who conspire to spark fear, and hatred in people for their own convoluted agenda.

The Somali pirates are criminals, not terrorists. So far most would agree, their motivation to attack ships for ransom is financial, and divested from any political or religious motives.

"These acts constitute a global crisis"

Blatant Hyperbole. This is not a global crisis by any measure. It is highly lozalized, you admitted as much.

"For the future stability of Somalia, it is critical that these countries continue to support the Transitional Federal Government in its struggle against the comparatively more militant Islamic Courts Union government that has taken the Somali capital. These and other steps will ensure further progress on the ground, allowing Somalia to eventually take action on its own to circumvent the terrorist activities originating at its shores."

Under the Islamic Government which you cited above, piracy declined to virtually nothing. It may come as a surprise to you, but this direct contradiction could threaten to undermine your entire essay.

"Somalia: Pirates Scared Off By Islamic Punishments

A year ago, we reported that pirates had hijacked two UN ships loaded with food supplies, destined for the poor of Somalia. These ships, the Torgelow and the MV Semlow, contained provisions from the UN's World Food Program. At that time, piracy in Somalia was so bad that the International Maritime Bureau described it as the "most serious in the world". There were 21 incidents in the six months from March 2005 to October 2005.

The Merchant International Group, which gives advice on trading in trouble spots around the world, said in a recent report: "The spread of Islamist rule in Somalia under the Islamic Courts Union merits particular attention. Over 40 attacks on vessels were reported in and around Somali waters between March 2005 and July 2006, but not a single act of piracy in the area has been reported in the months since."

westernresistance.com/blog/archives/003215.html

In the second paragraph you might want to add where these ships that they have are being held.

Your essay is rife with spurious claims and frightening evidence of indoctrination, but as is, it should pass grammatically, and also on the veracity of the content, if your professor is a completely incompetent idiot.
Mustafa1991   
Feb 20, 2009
Undergraduate / "Freedom is like air", UT Austin, statement of purpose [4]

That was very moving, even keeled, and flowed well.

I must be incredibly dense to ask this, but the first sentence is presumably referring to the unfortunate incident near the end of the story, right?

I cannot find any glaring mistakes, only the opportunity in a few parts to make great writing marginally better.

Unlike my peers who ...

It might not be your writing style, but you could make this transition more sensational.

In doing so, you could also add another dimension of unpredictability.

The way you might change the transition is contingent on when you were inspired by Dr. Cook. Did you "become" inspired by him prior in your life to this directional shift in the paper, where you subesquently refer to your mom becoming disabled, or is this a feeling of how you are inspired today? If you became inspired before, you can say that you finally/really had some purpose and motivation, but it was not to be, increasing the rhetoric sharply. If not, you can take a different angle, reminiscing on how you had come such a long way from vietnam and you were looking forward to college, then suddenly you became acquainted with another fact of life; it's unpredictability.
Mustafa1991   
Feb 20, 2009
Essays / How to Start an Essay (with the question?) [12]

To me, starting an essay with a question is unbearably cliche for an experienced audiece, with few exceptions in my limited experience.

- If you are a good writer you can quickly address the question in an unconventional manner which deflects attention and provides you with an opening to move the reader along rapidly.

- Sometimes you can deliberately craft a scintillating conclusion which you think follows from some premises and work it into the question. At this point the onus is on you to prove it with a series of points that you try to relate to each other at critical junctures.

At some point, using questions to open as a literay device becomes obsolete when you can just as easily state your assertions forcefully to open, with the benefit of increased clarity and diminished awkwardness.

Here's a basic idea, even though you don't say what the topic is.

1. What are the most important qualities in a person that determine their success?

2. Is there any quality that can conceivably rival the importance of X in determining the relative success of a person.
Mustafa1991   
Feb 20, 2009
Writing Feedback / Taking courses of more than one subject prepare students for a broad spectrum of careers [7]

2nd line - I have strong reason to believe that the first policy has early precedent, by empowering students with a basic understanding and framework of diverse subject areas and interests, so they can harness those skills to puruse highly specialized research and related endeavors in the field of their choice.

3rd line - Scrap "for one thing", this is colloquial

point - You might want to provide a symposium for the things you will be talking about in the early going, rather than jumping headfirst into it. Maybe start out with a sentence here that hints at the parallel nature of the points you will be making. Something like, "having a grasp of a wide variety of subject areas is multipurpose; it facillitates further learning, especially in fields where, without requisite knowledge, one might be incapable, or not have a good enough understanding of interdisciplinary material mutual to their field. This might ultimately prevent them from understanding and/or appreciating the dynamic intricacies that are characteristic of their chosen field.

This is just the educational aspect. It may be a run on, but it has relevant point. Notice how it can branch out into so many different subplots.

You can talk about the work aspect now, and there's alot of material you can work with. You already addressed these things somewhat, just that you don't do it in a well coordinated manner.

There's a philosophical aspect.

What about the practical aspect.

How to change a tire (auto). Discipline your child (child psychology). How to handle food to prevent illness (epidemiology). How to make a graph in excel, (basic ITE). The list goes on and on, and I mentioned these things in specific because I learned most of what I know about them in a wide variety of classes.

There are so many angles you can take. You can prove your point simply by pointing out the omnipresence of it. The question is not asking you to acknowledge specialization as much as it is asking you to give good reasons why taking different subjects is beneficial.
Mustafa1991   
Feb 20, 2009
Research Papers / The Psychological, Physiological, and Neurological effects of Marijuana and Cocaine Use in Humans. [34]

Sometimes my writing can suffer when I try to make it too pretty. My intention in that sentence which confused you, was to have continuity from the prior sentence. I couldn't think of any better way to illustrate that seamlessly at the time than to say "Because, they say" which should be construed that it's a continuation from the prior sentence. In short, "Because they say", serves a purpose that implies it [Because they say] should be disregarded and the words following it be considered where the last sentence ended.

"Finally there are some who in explaining, point to the basic, underlying culprit in blame as having to do with a timeless question; what is the meaning and purpose in life? Because, they say, for those who refute the question on the basis of its authenticity, are the very ones who are inclined to seek haven with drugs, away from the destitute recesses of their soul for a time. As of yet it doesn't appear that there will be any consensus on why people take mind altering drugs."

Here is a revised explanation.

"... what is the meaning and purpose in life, because those people who reject the question on the basis of its legitimacy, that is, they don't think there IS any purpose or meaning in life, will more or less be the ones who are compelled to use drugs."

I thought I would be cheating myself and the professor if I omitted the broader reasons entirely and began myopically as if the drugs and their effects were in and of themselves, the problems or issues that need to be dealt with.

I tried to merge the bigger reason into the less important reason by easing into it "Albeit begrdudgingly", but I guess it's conspicuously divergent from what I had been talking about all along. I thought it might be irrelevant, thanks for confirming it. It's going to pain me to change it, but I guess sometimes it's in your best interest to go with the script.
Mustafa1991   
Feb 19, 2009
Research Papers / Thesis Statement for global warming research paper [17]

Did you HAVE to choose global warming?

I just feel like it has been worn to death, and borrowing a page out of Rich's book, in a determinist vein, I don't think we will be able to stop whatever final calamity inevitably befalls mankind. Whether it is the sun burning up the earth, which scientists predict will happen in billions of years (wiping out all traces of our existence, AND purpose, for those less apt to believe in a higher being/afterlife), or something much more imminent and unexpected which I'm inclined to believe, I don't think humans can prevent against something on the scale that would threaten their viability. We are finite and there are threats we cannot possibly anticipate or avoid.

I have to say though, Sean's post was cogent and resourceful. He presented some novel arguments, although I think you might want to be wary of picking something that will be hard for you to defend. Most times it's better to go with something that you have a conviction and passion for. I would drop global warming if I had a choice to begin with.
Mustafa1991   
Feb 19, 2009
Research Papers / The Psychological, Physiological, and Neurological effects of Marijuana and Cocaine Use in Humans. [34]

I'm writing a 3 page term paper, not bad because I'm still in second year. I'm sure it'll get worse.

So far I've managed an introduction/thesis. I need some criticism on what I've already written, and some suggestions on an outline for this paper, specifically how do you think I should approach what is essentially a really broad topic. Can you identify my thesis clearly? The topic(s) is apparent in the title. I know three pages is not hard, and I could bang it out if I didn't care so much about being neat and chronological. I appreciate your help.

The Psychological, Physiological, and Neurological effects of Marijuana and Cocaine Use in Humans.

Overview: The Physiological, and Neurological effects of Marijuana Use in Humans.

The United States has consistently been ranked among the highest in the world in terms of illegal drug use. But many contend that the problem is not confined to any normative boundaries such as race, nationality, or socioeconomic status. They posit that the use of psychoactive drugs is an inherent manifestation of a primal desire of humans to alter one's consciousness or state of mind. Others ascribe a different reason; they claim that recreational drug use is just a way to ease the burdens of work, relationships, and the hardships of life. Finally there are some who in explaining, point to the basic, underlying culprit in blame as having to do with a timeless question; what is the meaning and purpose in life? Because, they say, those who refute the question on the basis of its legitimacy are the very ones who are compelled to seek haven with drugs, away from the destitute recesses of their soul for a time. As of yet it doesn't appear that there will be any consensus on why people take mind altering drugs. There may very well be more than one reason, and for that matter the reasons may be overlapped and intertwined. Perhaps the answer varies depending on the profile of the user, or possibly the answer has not been conceived. What we are discussing here are the much debated, functional and principle reasoning mechanisms that govern people's emotive and perceptual, conscious or subconscious, attributions for why they take drugs, using a broad, anteceding approach. While a psychologist might be interested in and have something to add to that discussion, in lieu of any forthright answer, in the immediate term, there is a scholarly consensus based in decades of research, that illegal psychoactive drugs such as marijuana and cocaine, exact a toll on your health. Albeit begrudgingly, we must take a less insightful, more exigent route to understand and seek all that we can about the effects of these drugs, for our purposes marijuana and cocaine. How do marijuana and cocaine exert their effects, what is the nature of their effects, and how do they cause some people to become dependent or addicted to them?

The psychoactive drug Cannabis, commonly known today as marijuana, green, or pot, is derived from the Cannabis Sativa plant. Routes of administration include smoking, ingestion, and rarely, rectal insertion of a solution including oil and water. Tetrahydrocannibanol (THC), the active ingredient in marijuana, is several times more pervasive, and rapidly absorbed (in seconds) in the blood of someone who has smoked marijuana, as opposed to eating or drinking it, wherein it may take an hour to feel the effects. It is responsible for the acute, physiological effects experienced shortly after use, and a myriad of effects on the heart, brain, and lungs which may become more pronounced over long term or chronic use. It has been shown that after mere minutes smoking marijuana, a person's heart rate increases typically anywhere from 20-50%, and may sometimes double. An increase in heart rate, tachycardia is not believed to be a direct effect of marijuana on the heart; rather it is an indirect result of changes which occur in the autonomic nerves that preside over the regulation of heart rate. Other acute effects frequently reported are the reddening or prominence of bloodshot eyes, which can be attributed to a swelling of the conjunctivas blood vessels, and dry mouth, due to reduced salivation. The user will also, often times experience a shift in appetite and a ravenous urge to eat or drink. Euphoria and elation predominate initially, followed by a period of lingering drowsiness, which some users may try to delay or subvert by taking repeated doses. Performance is adversely affected as there may be difficulty concentrating, remembering, or coordinating and balancing one's movements; this is consistent with an overall decline in motor skills. Some people report being detached and to some extent cognizant of a dissolution in deed and perception known as depersonalization, which is, among the more variable effects that not all of, or even most people might experience, including altered sense of time, anxiety, and sharper vision coupled with visual distortions. While the effects described here occur often enough in people that use marijuana to be relevant and repeated with regularity, with the exception of a few, because of people's varying experiences due to common factors such as dose, prior usage history, experience, THC content, and some would even argue setting and expectations although research hasn't proven it, they don't occur in all users or in the vast majority of times following use.

Cannabinoid receptors are sites in the brain that correspond to the endogenous neurotransmitter anandamide. Tetrahydrocannibanol acts by attaching to cannabinoid receptors on nerve cells in multiple regions of the brain. Those regions of the brain with an abundance of cannabinoid receptors are therefore more prone to the influence of THC, and as a result the more consistent and apparent effects of marijuana use mostly have to do with functions that are regulated by areas of the brain most susceptible to THC. Marijuana has attained a good bit of notoriety in schools across the United States, partly because it is the most widely used illegal drug among teenagers, but also because its widespread use permeates into the classroom during school, and on the football field and other sports arenas after school. These areas have come to be emblematic of some of the most troublesome effects and shortcomings of marijuana use. Instructors and school officials may become suspicious of marijuana or drug use in the case of a student whose grades have declined considerably in conjunction with unusual behavior such as sleeping in class, displaying inattention, or missing homework assignments and being inconsistent. When THC in marijuana attaches to cannabinoid receptors in various regions of the brain, one area affected heavily is the Hippocampus, which is responsible for learning and memory vital to success in school. Other regions also influenced considerably include the Cerebellum, responsible for body movement and coordination, the Cerebral Cortex, agent of higher cognitive functions, the Nucleus Accumbens, a reward center, and the Basal Ganglia, also involved in movement control. Researchers and others alike tend to be especially interested in the Nucleus Accumbens, an aggregation of neurons in the forebrain thought to have a strong bearing on reward, pleasure, and addiction among other things. People who use marijuana may not be aware of it, but the euphoria and bliss that they seek occur in tandem with increased levels of dopamine in the Nucleus Accumbens, a finding that is also characteristic of most every other recreational drug. The Hippocampus is another region of the brain that draws a lot of attention with regard to marijuana use. Neurons in the Hippocampus control memory and related learning functions, so as people get older and lose neurons their ability to remember things decreases. THC accelerates this process by aging neuron cells prematurely, which might hasten the imminence of their death and impair memory in the user. The persistence of this effect, although not at this time thought to be permanent, is longer than the period of intoxication and probably less inclined to wear off with more chronic use.

If someone smokes cigarettes for a week and never again, we can conclude with reasonable certainty that it won't affect their long term health prognosis. However, if the same person smokes for 30 years, bravely assuming that they are not already suffering from, most likely they are at an increased risk for lung cancer, heart disease, and other ailments that only develop over long term use. Much in the same way, research today indicates that using marijuana in the short term does not have any permanent adverse effect in humans. Less certain though, is whether or not long term Cannabis use is to the detriment of the user. There are several purported long term effects of marijuana use that have been studied; some are more credible than others. These effects pertain to the individual who has used marijuana daily, heavily, for many, many years. As to which factor would have a greater bearing on our definition of a heavy, long term user, frequency of use has precedent over the quantity of dose. Research has provided considerable evidence that cannabinoids in marijuana, particularly THC, induce immunological changes in rodent animals in the cell-mediated and humeral immune system. The method used to show impaired cell-mediated immune system function is a decreased lymphocyte response in reaction to T-cell mitogens. To demonstrate an impaired humeral immune system the same method is used, except that the muted reaction is in response to B-cell mitogens, T-cells being characteristic of the cell mediated immune system, and B-cells being characteristic of the humeral immune system. Due to these changes, the result is an increased risk of bacterial or viral infection. The relevance of these findings is mitigated however, because the doses required in order to incur these changes have been very high, which adds to the stand alone problem of applying results in rodents to humans. Another obvious concern is that the evidence does not address the possibility that tolerance would develop in humans, perhaps making these findings irrelevant altogether. In the limited human experimental and clinical data, there is unresolved, likely evidence that THC impairs cell-mediated immune system function. What to make of studies that have implicated THC in suppressed immune system function is uncertain because the expectation is that reduced immune system function would result in an increase of infectious diseases, yet there has been no epidemiological outbreak of diseases among chronic heavy cannabis users. One study of HIV positive gay men suggests that their continued use of marijuana did not put them at an increased risk of worsening to AIDS. Considering the extent of marijuana use in western society, reconciled with the fact that there has been no epidemiological outbreak of infectious diseases among users, the evidence is in favor of it being unlikely that smoking cannabis leads to major dysfunction in the immune system. It is not as easy to rule out marijuana use in minor immune system impairment that cannot be as easily detected, but would instead take the form of an unsuspecting cold or other common, bacterial or viral illness.

Healthy young adults who use Cannabis do not show any prolonged strain on their cardiovascular system, as the effect is comparable to common stress. People with preexisting heart conditions such as atherosclerosis however, appear to be at a special risk and are advised to abstain from cannabis use. In chronic heavy users who smoke cannabis, the effects on the respiratory system are similar to a person who smokes tobacco. Most of the health problems in the respiratory system mutual to tobacco and chronic heavy marijuana use arise because of the method of administration, smoking, not because of anything that can be isolated as a byproduct of the cannabinoids. Coughing, wheezing, and sputum production, all which are symptoms of chronic bronchitis, can result from chronic heavy cannabis use. Additionally, chronic bronchitis and cancer of the respiratory tract are probably a more common occurrence in heavy chronic marijuana users for the same reason they are more common in tobacco smokers. A preexisting respiratory condition such as asthma might be exacerbated by smoking cannabis; the same concern with a preexisting heart condition, and the reason why people with respiratory illnesses are advised not to smoke cannabis. Evidence indicates that chronic heavy marijuana use causes microscopic changes in lung tissue, like those that occur prior to lung cancer. At this time it is debated whether or not cannabis smoke causes cancer, with certain studies indicating it does, and others, very recently showing otherwise, that it does not. Although it remains to be proven definitively, the cancer-marijuana link probably presents the most ominous risk in the perception of a casual cannabis user who does not smoke tobacco, and plausibly even in users that smoke cannabis and tobacco, out of fear that the risks may be mounting to cause for a reconsideration of their habits. It's worth noting that even if it is proven beyond any doubt that smoking cannabis causes cancer in chronic heavy users, the results would by and large be insignificant to the typical, infrequent user, but ostensibly still persuade some to discontinue cannabis use, or use cannabis less frequently, and others not to begin.
Mustafa1991   
Jan 31, 2009
Undergraduate / 'Team leader and vice president' - How has your Environment influenced you [4]

I'm not sure about what the requirements are with regard to the length of the essay, in any case I feel that you do not give due service by failing to go in detail about your family life, school, etc. Your inability to properly elaborate on each point detracts from your paper and undermines your credibility. "There are so many skills and qualities that I apply today to my life and carry throughout my whole existence, where primarily build at home and school." This sentence is blatant filler material when you have scarcely attributed any of your paper to the origins and experiences which engendered these fine qualities you speak of. I recommend that you revisit the environment before you proceed into rattling off qualities in the person it made. That's just in addressing the framework of your paper, there are a multitude of grammar errors which are secondary.
Mustafa1991   
Jan 31, 2009
Undergraduate / UofM-Setback Essay ("be active and outspoken in both business and life") [4]

It's pretty tight, in one pass I only managed to find a few errors. I'm 17 myself, I can relate to the theme of your story about not being taken seriously due to an age limitation, even more so because I am a finance major and trade and invest myself (I'm hoping to do my MBA at UofMd as well when the day comes). At the same time I feel it would be inappropriate to advise you on schematics or anything with serious bearing on the outcome of your paper for that matter. I am happy to make a few minor suggestions that I feel I am at liberty to discuss. Then,

the few errors I did manage to find:

8th line from the bottom, I think you intend to say "intimidated" instead of intimated
2nd line from the top is a little awkward for my taste, rephrase or replace a few words, perhaps "I exchanged shoulders ..." a little refinement is in order.

Now that I think about it, I could probably point out these minor infractions all throughout your paper, but that is not what you posted help for. That said, I think you were a little terse in explaining what lesson you learned, and whatever story or theme you do decide to go with, make sure your writing is crisp because that can often salvage an otherwise unsatisfactory essay.
Mustafa1991   
Jan 31, 2009
Writing Feedback / College Dropout Rates - vause & Effect Essay in 3rd person, need direction [5]

Hello Denise, assuming that is your name. This is my first post as well so let me be out with it in saying that I don't pull any punches. Now that we have taken care of formalities we can address your introduction on college dropout rates.

I must say, the tone you project is not exactly my favorite, and even that is when it's executed seamlessly. You make many grammatical errors relating to the issue of tense agreement, which in turn condemn your paper that already had high aspirations to begin with.

Here are a few examples that I feel you should correct:

"There was much to be anticipated when Denise, a then high school student envisioned college."

Don't make the mistake of assuming your readers are stupid, when you start out "there was much to be anticipated" you can safely assume that your reader can guess this is taking place in the past, it follows that "a then high school student" be ommitted. If you insist on clarifying here is an alternative, ... "a high school student at the time envisioned college".

Your second sentence does not deviate far from this theme of tense agreement.

"She had spent countless hours filling out admissions and scholarship applications, talked about all the details of campus and classes, to anyone who'd listen."

When you include "filling" in the first part of the sentence, you cannot suddenly switch gears and say "talked" in the second part. One is happening now, and the other presumably in hindsight. Either change it to "talking", or start a new sentence after "applications", . She talked ...

On to the subject of your second paragraph. Let me reiterate in saying that I don't like the approach you take in your paper to begin with, but if you must do it, consistency cannot be stressed enough. That is, in grammar, delivery, and tone. In the first line of your second paragraph we are accosted with a great statistic in an enlightening tone, thereafter you attempt some continuity, including the character of your story in a melodramatic sort of way, "she couldn't comprehend it", it just comes across as phony, unwieldy and patronizing. The single most serious error you make is by waltzing back and forth between two entirely different tones, one cogent and the other with this anecdotal story quotes and all, the result is that it sounds like a children's story.

I recommend that you try to achieve some consistency in your story, all else is secondary in my opinion.

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